Living with Purpose with Corbie Mitleid

[00:00:03] After over 25 years of marriage, we've learned that successful couples have great friendships,

[00:00:09] put each other first and focus on light just as much as love.

[00:00:13] We believe marriage should be fun and easy.

[00:00:16] Our goal is to share our journey with the hopes of helping others build strong happy relationships.

[00:00:22] Join us as we continue to create our lives beyond I do.

[00:00:38] Do your partner want to learn several ways to grow closer?

[00:00:41] Do you and your partner want to grow happier together?

[00:00:45] Do you and your partner want to be a unified front?

[00:00:49] Do you and your partner want to divorce proof your marriage?

[00:00:52] If you answered yesterday's questions, you need to check our iReboot, A Like of Forever.

[00:00:57] Take keys to a successful marriage beyond I do.

[00:01:01] Each section focuses on a different aspect of marriage and briefly describes how we handled it in our relationship.

[00:01:07] At the end of the section, you're given an action step or key to complete with your partner.

[00:01:12] These keys are practical steps you can immediately implement in your relationship

[00:01:17] and help your partner be proactive and intentional about your relationship.

[00:01:22] You can purchase your copy on Amazon.com.

[00:01:25] And until next time, we will holla at y'all.

[00:01:38] Before we get into our episode, we want to share this disclaimer.

[00:01:42] We are not marriage counselors, nor are we mental health professionals.

[00:01:47] We simply want to share with you what has worked in our marriage.

[00:01:50] Now onto our episode.

[00:02:07] Welcome back to the beyond I do podcast.

[00:02:10] Thank you for joining us and we have a very special guest with us on this episode.

[00:02:15] We have Ms. Corby Midlide with us.

[00:02:19] She is an intuitive counselor.

[00:02:21] She specializes in past life and terror reading.

[00:02:28] And she is going to share with us how we can make the best out of our relationship by making certain that we are focused on our specific purpose and passion.

[00:02:43] So thank you for joining us.

[00:02:45] Thank you.

[00:02:45] Oh, it's a pleasure to be here. Thanks for asking.

[00:02:48] So if you would start off by telling us a little bit about you, a little bit about what is that you do and how you help individuals find that purpose and path through their passion.

[00:03:03] Okay, sure.

[00:03:04] So this is going to be, I often call it my 32nd elevator speech and it's going to be a mix of the two I normally use intuitive counselor. What does that mean certified terror master past life specialist psychic medium channel, all that stuff.

[00:03:21] But I'm extremely practical.

[00:03:24] I am not, as they say one of those psychics who thinks her or don't stink.

[00:03:29] I'm not with angels.

[00:03:32] It's, I'm here in service. I take my work seriously me not so much so it's here your opportunities and how to grab them.

[00:03:39] Here's the tough stuff here's how to get through it around it. Here's your toolbox go rock and roll.

[00:03:44] And one of the reasons that I am able to do that as well as I do is, you know, I kid and say, Well, I'm not a size to blonde with a trust fund.

[00:03:53] It has been a very rough life.

[00:03:56] Three bats of breast cancer to divorces rape poverty abuse you name it.

[00:04:00] But this is what 69 looks like 20 years clear of the cancer on the other side with a great marriage.

[00:04:07] So I remind people, I'm not special.

[00:04:11] If I can get through that so can you just need the tools you need to learn about the examined life.

[00:04:18] You need to find out your sentence of passion which is what you want to tell God you did when you were down here.

[00:04:25] You work.

[00:04:27] You realize all relationships are always a work in progress.

[00:04:30] Both partners must grow together.

[00:04:33] Even if it's not in the exact same direction.

[00:04:36] Right.

[00:04:38] So I've been doing this work full time since 911, six days a week 14 hours a day.

[00:04:45] I read about 1000 people a year and I get to get up in the morning. I don't have to get up in the morning.

[00:04:51] That's really the biggest gift.

[00:04:53] Wow.

[00:04:54] Awesome.

[00:04:54] That's fantastic.

[00:04:55] And I know that I said it before when we met you the first time and I sense it now. Like I said before we started this has been a day and you come through.

[00:05:11] Yeah, it comes through and so I can appreciate that.

[00:05:15] I thank you for sharing that gift to help others.

[00:05:21] It's what I'm here to do, Margaret. I mean there's just no way around it when you know why you chose to come down here at a certain point.

[00:05:30] I mean, the world you've had a Monday. The world has had a Monday for years and it isn't what we grew up with.

[00:05:38] We have no idea what it's going to be.

[00:05:40] I don't know any generation, even the greatest generation that was dancing on quicksand the way we do.

[00:05:50] So we have got to be here in service to each other now. Not everybody is going to be.

[00:05:58] But if you know, you can take even the smallest something and help someone give them courage, give them a moment to breathe.

[00:06:08] That's what you're here to do. It is not a mistake that you chose to be born now.

[00:06:16] And so when you say that it sounds, you make it sound so easy. You make it sound like...

[00:06:24] No.

[00:06:24] Clear, yes?

[00:06:26] Not so much.

[00:06:29] So what do we do? What do we do when I want to have that confidence?

[00:06:34] I want to know what it is that I chose to be here for. So what do we do to get to that point?

[00:06:43] Okay.

[00:06:44] Okay. What we're talking about is one of the major legs of what I call the three-legged stool.

[00:06:50] Getting clear on your purpose is what we're going to talk about, but there's also getting clear in relationships and getting clear with spirit.

[00:06:57] You got those three legs strong, you are not going to fall on to that.

[00:07:04] So our sentence of passion is what I call it. It's not who you are or what you do or even how you do it.

[00:07:12] It's your vapor trail. When you go skidding into heaven on ball tires and fumes in the tank, God had your beer and says,

[00:07:19] so tell me, you go, I did this? Isn't it cool?

[00:07:23] Now my sentence of passion is cross the bridge from fear to fearlessness and fly.

[00:07:29] When I could take somebody from point A to point B when they thought they couldn't make it, whack them on their shoulder and say,

[00:07:35] here are your wings. No, you don't need a flight plan. Get.

[00:07:37] I'm living my bliss, but I have done it all my life as an actress, an author, an inspirational speaker, a video producer, a legal assistant,

[00:07:46] an executive recruiter and an intuitive. It's not your job.

[00:07:51] Okay.

[00:07:52] But the thing is when people come to me and say, what is my purpose? I just look at him and go.

[00:08:00] I haven't lived your life, my darlings. I haven't faced your challenges. I haven't learned your truths. That's all you.

[00:08:08] So I teach people there are two ways to do it. Yes, I've got a consultation that you can do with me and it's lots of questions.

[00:08:17] But you know what? I always downsell myself if you could do it a less expensive way, do it.

[00:08:22] So there is a chapter in my book, Clean Out Your Life Closet and it's called Getting Clear on Your Purpose.

[00:08:30] And I asked six very important questions in there. The first one is what has your life been about?

[00:08:39] And that's not as easy as saying friends or money or whatever because let's say your life has always revolved around not having enough money.

[00:08:52] Three ways you could look at it. You're so panicked about not having enough money, you will do anything legal or illegal to get it.

[00:09:02] Or you're convinced that you will never have enough money and you're in a perpetual victim head.

[00:09:11] Or you say, okay, if money is tight can I learn to live frugally so that simplicity is enough?

[00:09:19] So the one thing is money but there are three different ways of looking at it.

[00:09:24] Let's say that you always fight for the underdog whether or not they win.

[00:09:34] Is that because you feel justice isn't fair or you simply want to lift these people up?

[00:09:41] When you decide what is key for your life, the patterns that you always follow then you're going to find the answer to that.

[00:09:53] I mean with me, all the things I've been through in order to get through them I had to go from fear to fearlessness.

[00:10:01] And so that goes through everything that I've done. That's how I created my sentence of passion.

[00:10:07] The next one is where does my happiness live?

[00:10:12] Okay, you gotta ask yourself that.

[00:10:14] And it's not necessarily material things. It's who are you?

[00:10:21] With me, words are my drug of choice.

[00:10:26] I love lecturing. I'm a writer. So that's important to me to communicate out with people.

[00:10:36] My beloved stepmother Shirley God rest her gorgeous soul.

[00:10:40] She was never happier than when she was digging in the dirt.

[00:10:45] And that's why when she got left and divorced by her first husband in her fifties,

[00:10:54] she went I think it was Temple University and she got her degree in landscape design.

[00:11:00] Wow.

[00:11:00] She didn't care how old she was.

[00:11:01] And so she started working on arboretums, things like that.

[00:11:07] She knew that's what she was happy with.

[00:11:09] And when she married my dad, she would go in the back and she would put little plugs of moss and she'd dig in the backyard.

[00:11:17] Because we had woods in the backyard.

[00:11:18] So that's an example. What makes you happy? Where do you feel like you're running on all cylinders?

[00:11:25] The next thing is where do you find comfort?

[00:11:30] That's not potato chips in video games.

[00:11:37] What do you surround yourself with?

[00:11:41] For me, comfort is I gotta have my main coon cats because they're my kids.

[00:11:49] I am no longer a city girl.

[00:11:51] I get to live in a little bungalow in a 12 acre hayfield in the middle of nothing.

[00:11:58] Wow.

[00:11:59] But that feeds my soul.

[00:12:01] Right.

[00:12:02] So even if I lived in the city, I would find a way to go to the country and sit.

[00:12:07] Okay.

[00:12:07] So that's what makes you happy.

[00:12:10] What crises changed your life? That's enormous.

[00:12:12] With me, oh I had plenty to choose from.

[00:12:16] Probably the biggest one was the cancer dance three times since the last one took me from a dolly part and figure to a fat fire plug with permanent side effects.

[00:12:28] Double mastectomy over is out.

[00:12:31] No choice.

[00:12:32] Oh wow.

[00:12:32] But some people, a friend of mine was, she lost everything in the campfire in California.

[00:12:43] I've had friends who lost things in Houston because of the massive floods a few years ago.

[00:12:50] I have had people who one month after they got married, their husband was killed in a car accident.

[00:12:57] Oh no.

[00:12:57] So you look at what you've lived through.

[00:13:00] Mm hmm.

[00:13:00] You acknowledge your strength and you see how that forged you like good steel.

[00:13:12] The next thing is very simple.

[00:13:14] How do you learn or work best?

[00:13:16] Remember, I said that words are my drug of choice and obviously I think people are fun.

[00:13:23] You're going to put me in a back office where I'm just doing data entry.

[00:13:26] I will be about inches.

[00:13:29] Are you left brain, which is logic?

[00:13:33] Very spark or right brain.

[00:13:36] If people don't know what that is, left brain goes A to B to C to D.

[00:13:40] Right brain goes A to Z degree to Paris.

[00:13:45] Do you learn best by seeing something done, hearing how to do it or doing it yourself?

[00:13:53] Those are the things you need to learn about yourself.

[00:13:56] It's yeah, you love your new car, but you know how to change the oil and put in gas.

[00:14:01] Right.

[00:14:02] That's what the learner, how you learn to work best.

[00:14:05] And the last thing is what do you want to be remembered for?

[00:14:09] And don't say oh I'm just me.

[00:14:12] No one's going to remember me.

[00:14:13] That's not true.

[00:14:15] If you have people in your life, they'll remember you.

[00:14:19] Right.

[00:14:20] My father was a magnificent internist, cardiologist, director of the hard station Cooper hospital in Camden for 30 years, Camden, New Jersey.

[00:14:32] And he retired in 89 he died in 2001 and they still talk about him at the hospital with love and respect.

[00:14:43] Me, I want to help people get past their limits, grab their life and love it with both hands and laugh when they remember how I told them how to do it.

[00:15:00] Because yeah, I'm funny.

[00:15:04] I've always said that I wanted to be like a cross between Swami beyond Amanda and Wayne Dyer.

[00:15:11] Funny as hell but normal enough you could borrow my lawn mower.

[00:15:14] And that's pretty much where I am.

[00:15:16] So, and those are just six questions of the enormous list that I have when you're working with me one or one, because you will end up with two things.

[00:15:28] One of them is your sentence of passion, which is your rallying cry to the world.

[00:15:33] But you're also going to find your motto and I encourage people don't just pull something out of Hallmark.

[00:15:39] Right.

[00:15:40] Okay.

[00:15:41] Because that's everybody's find out what's real for you.

[00:15:45] So technically I'll have two models.

[00:15:48] The public one is live the examined life.

[00:15:50] What's that mean?

[00:15:52] This is happening and I don't like it, but I have to go through it.

[00:15:54] What am I learning from it?

[00:15:57] How can I teach with it next?

[00:15:59] But the one that is truly internal is actually a quote from a wonderful book by Robert Heinlein called Time Enough for Love.

[00:16:07] And it's in life moderation is for monks take big bites.

[00:16:12] I love it.

[00:16:13] Right.

[00:16:14] I love it.

[00:16:15] And that's obvious by the list of things that you have that you've gone through and you're here with us today with a smile on your face and helping out.

[00:16:29] I hope the next lifetime I give myself a little more R&R but yeah, this one I managed.

[00:16:35] And you said 69 and I don't see it.

[00:16:39] No.

[00:16:40] Magic words darling.

[00:16:41] No children takes 10 years off.

[00:16:46] Oh, we're about we're about 26 and a half years too late.

[00:16:55] Wow.

[00:16:56] Well, and like I said, like it comes through and to hear all that you've been through and then the fact that you want to use that.

[00:17:05] Not to kind of sulk in it but to help others get through and it doesn't come off in a braggy.

[00:17:13] I'm here type way.

[00:17:16] It's beautiful to hear that.

[00:17:19] So you've given us these these questions that we go through and we examine ourselves and then we are set with the task of using those things to figure out why we are here at this time.

[00:17:35] And then what?

[00:17:37] And then you find wonderful ways of doing it, you know, a lot of women come to me empty nesters or they've retired and they don't know what to do with themselves.

[00:17:47] And I say well what do you want.

[00:17:49] And they look at me blankly.

[00:17:51] It's because women are taught not to want.

[00:17:56] You know, let's I'll use the example before.

[00:18:01] And there's a plate of cookies and we're smart. We know the big one has more than the little ones so we go for the big one.

[00:18:06] And our mother says you're bad and you're selfish. So you're not going to get the cookie and she gives it to your little brother who eats it at you.

[00:18:13] Little brothers do that.

[00:18:14] But then she says besides girls who eat cookies get back know that he likes to factor out to you really want the cookie.

[00:18:20] So we are subliminally taught by the time we're six or seven, at least our generation.

[00:18:28] If you want anything, you're wrong, you're bad, you'll be punished and you have to watch somebody else get it.

[00:18:35] And I am here to tell you that's old news.

[00:18:38] That is absolutely old news there is nothing wrong with wanting to do something.

[00:18:44] The only thing that won't help you is meeting it.

[00:18:49] Right. Why?

[00:18:51] If I have 100 things that I think I need and I only get 50 of them.

[00:18:56] Now look at everything I didn't get when you want 100 things but you get 50 of them.

[00:19:02] Wow, look what I got.

[00:19:03] I love that's why words are so important.

[00:19:07] Want is okay. Need is a crutch.

[00:19:10] I love that.

[00:19:12] I love that.

[00:19:15] I tend to lean towards need, which puts me in a position of I look at the things that I didn't get.

[00:19:24] So I love that want versus need so yeah.

[00:19:29] So we have the first leg which is purpose and that moves to the next leg of relationships.

[00:19:37] Yep.

[00:19:38] And I have experience.

[00:19:41] I had two very short marriages.

[00:19:43] The first one lasted less than a year and I left the day he started throwing me against the wall.

[00:19:50] And the second one lasted less than two years.

[00:19:57] I'd known this guy for 12 years we've been friends.

[00:19:59] We figured that's as good a reason as any to get married.

[00:20:02] And we were living in New York.

[00:20:04] He didn't like New York.

[00:20:06] He wanted California.

[00:20:07] I said I'm sorry.

[00:20:08] I am not married.

[00:20:08] There are four seasons there.

[00:20:10] Fire, blood, earthquake and mudslide.

[00:20:11] I'm not going.

[00:20:13] So we settled on Atlanta.

[00:20:16] Now when we got down there, it was fine.

[00:20:18] I mean, it was great.

[00:20:21] I learned to give directions by the big chicken.

[00:20:24] I learned to go.

[00:20:25] You know, you know I had to hang up my Philadelphia Phillies hat and go for the Atlanta Braves.

[00:20:32] After a couple of years.

[00:20:33] He decided he just didn't want to be married and he left.

[00:20:36] went to California and I was stuck down there and all of a sudden I was the evil

[00:20:42] Yankee single woman who's on a steal then husband you know part of it is I'm

[00:20:50] not a Magnolia I'm a bagel right she was a surfboard but after three weeks of

[00:20:59] playing the wounded wife I said what do I want and what it was is I wanted to

[00:21:05] keep my friend so I said if you want to leave fine leave but I want to keep the

[00:21:11] friendship that changed everything we did everything on a handshake he was always

[00:21:17] right there with the financial help he promised gave me extra if he had it and

[00:21:22] after I moved back up to New York and met and married the wonderful guy I've

[00:21:26] been with for a century now he and I still send each other birthday cards he

[00:21:31] was mr. lion I was miss kitty hello and this this is the magic before we get to

[00:21:37] how you get there this is what happens when you respond instead of react to a

[00:21:43] problem rich died very young in his early 50s in 2007 in October your

[00:21:51] following March March is my birthday month I was lecturing at a spiritualist

[00:21:56] church in Rochester and it was rookie day that's when people that have never

[00:22:01] given messages are allowed to get up if they have a message so this very

[00:22:06] nervous girl comes up to me it's a Reverend Corby I have met mess again

[00:22:11] yes you can come to me and she closes her eyes and you can tell she's trying

[00:22:15] not to cry because she thinks we'll all think she's crazy and she goes there

[00:22:19] is a very chubby man and he looks like Santa Claus only he's younger and

[00:22:24] he's blonde and he has red t-shirt and shirts and sandals and he's holding

[00:22:29] you cat that looks like it's a side me but it has long hair and he's making

[00:22:33] your way but you and he's blowing your kisses and I'm just laughing because

[00:22:38] that's rich

[00:22:40] he did look like Santa Claus young I know what T shirt that was he was a

[00:22:47] computer jock shirts and sandals is how we went to work the cat he was

[00:22:52] holding was our Himalayan Kaiser Wilhelm and it was a week before my

[00:22:56] birthday

[00:22:58] well also now if we had had a bitter divorce that wouldn't have

[00:23:03] happened right that was a miracle from the great beyond right there to me is

[00:23:07] proof if you can nurture the relationship and not make it this

[00:23:14] you have no idea what you're creating

[00:23:17] well let's look at the eight things that I talk about for being in a good

[00:23:25] relationship

[00:23:26] their first one is talk

[00:23:27] yeah

[00:23:29] how many people just you know it's not worth the argument he won't

[00:23:35] understand it he always questions and so they stopped talking right talking

[00:23:41] is how you get together with people it's you're not afraid to talk you find out

[00:23:49] more about yourself it's how you grow together

[00:23:54] now when you got a problem you have to make it about the challenge not

[00:23:58] personal sniping okay let's say that you live in a small apartment you and

[00:24:04] your person and there's not enough closet space and somehow your stuff

[00:24:08] always ends up on the floor of the closet

[00:24:10] the way to discuss it is look we don't seem to have enough closet space and

[00:24:16] I'm noticing my stuff always ends up on the floor what can we do to fix it

[00:24:21] that is much better than looking at your partner and saying you are such a

[00:24:25] closet page

[00:24:27] which one do you think when you don't snipe then nobody comes back at you

[00:24:34] and says well you never clean up the kitchen which totally takes it out into

[00:24:38] crazy town right so always we make it a we and figure out what we can do together

[00:24:47] to solve this problem to make it better for all of us

[00:24:51] so so sarcasm doesn't work

[00:24:55] depends what state you're in new york yeah

[00:25:00] well we're down south so

[00:25:03] you know first yeah yep I do I do remember my mother was from tidewater

[00:25:10] virginia and I know the n or f o l k is pronounced in awful north folk

[00:25:16] all the northerners do all right the next one is two versus at

[00:25:21] and this is really important when someone comes home and they're just railing about

[00:25:29] this is bad and that's bad and that went wrong sometimes if you don't know where

[00:25:34] that's coming from you'll feel attacked and you'll attack back

[00:25:40] my husband when he was a museum director for an eight building revolution in worst

[00:25:46] idea he had two bosses the county board of supervisors and historical

[00:25:52] society board of trustees and that was hard so we would sometimes come home and

[00:25:57] write and write and write and I'd say okay are you yelling to me or at me

[00:26:01] what's the difference yelling to me means you just have to get it out

[00:26:06] and I will put the spiritual duct tape on my mouth and I will hold space for you

[00:26:10] if you're yelling at me that means we have a problem that we need to solve

[00:26:14] and then you roll it back to challenge not personal sniping

[00:26:19] now the another versus is fixed versus listen every couple one of them's a fixer

[00:26:27] there's a problem they're always can we do this can we do that yeah now

[00:26:32] sometimes I think out loud and I'm talking about this and then this happened to ba ba ba

[00:26:38] and my husband has learned do not just say well have you tried this or why did

[00:26:45] you look at that because he's deflecting me from how I'm trying to think and then I just lose it

[00:26:50] and there we go so when he sees me going stomp stomp stomp he says okay do you want me to try

[00:26:56] to fix this with you or you want me just to listen if I say just listen then he puts on

[00:27:02] the spiritual duct tape and hold space and then I might say okay I'm done now let's see if we can fix

[00:27:09] this then what that signals is I am absolutely ready to listen to anything that he has to say

[00:27:16] and we can do this together and frankly solving a problem together is bonding remember that's how

[00:27:22] you grow together that's talking but okay so the next thing is the 60 60 which surprises people

[00:27:30] what do you mean 50 50 is good but 60 60 means each person goes a little bit more than halfway

[00:27:38] and it's the extra 10 percent that locks it in the touch times I don't know we were only married 18 months

[00:27:46] when the doctors told me three strikes you're out you know we're we're doing the double

[00:27:51] mast after me we're taking the old grays and we're going to really destroy you internally

[00:27:56] your marriage is not going to look the same and he looked at me and he said am I going

[00:28:04] to miss him yeah they were gorgeous but I married you not them yeah I know I did not realize what a hero

[00:28:10] I had this marriage looks very very different than we thought it was going to because we only had

[00:28:19] 18 months of a normal marriage right all the rest of the time 20 years we've had to work

[00:28:28] I sort of want to say crippled but not quite it's like when you drop your cell phone and the

[00:28:36] screenshot cracks but it's still there right I still use the phone but it's more difficult

[00:28:41] right so that's what this marriage has been but what I will say is because we've had to

[00:28:48] work with each other like this we're more in love now than we were the day we got married

[00:28:53] because we had to make it work right so the 6060 was everything that Carl did for me

[00:29:02] when I was figuring out who am I what am I going to do yeah now two years ago he had

[00:29:13] jaw surgery and he's a musician so this was serious stuff I didn't feel put upon a car

[00:29:20] okay this is where my 60 comes in that's why 6060 is so important yeah the other thing is you first

[00:29:31] then the relationship and what do you mean after 6060 if you don't take care of yourself yes

[00:29:37] you won't have enough to give to your partner the kids whoever it is that you work with

[00:29:47] um I need more quiet than he does so there will be times that I tell him all right I'm going to

[00:29:55] plug in which means I put on my earbuds and I go and look at one of the ambient videos on YouTube

[00:30:05] that shows you know the night beach and I just calm down his thing is he's got to play music

[00:30:13] and he plays he's like tuba bassoon double bell euphonium you name it okay he blacks and so I make

[00:30:22] sure that I make room for him to do that I don't schedule um readings when I know he has to practice

[00:30:30] we work with each other we each put ourselves first so we have enough to give to each other

[00:30:41] only all right um don't supplement your needs for instance what I just talked about when I say oh

[00:30:50] well he's got to practice or he's doing this what happens is it's like ratcheting up the string

[00:30:59] of the guitar and you eventually you're going to break it because you've turned the pegs too much

[00:31:05] so if you need something tell your partner right yeah I know I said need versus want but sometimes

[00:31:10] there are needs right I need you know I've been cooking in the kitchen for two weeks I really

[00:31:16] need to go out to dinner tonight now mind you I love cooking and there are a few restaurants that

[00:31:21] cook better than I do but sometimes all you want is the diner right smokey bones because I don't

[00:31:34] okay um and so make room for each other with that

[00:31:40] and give the relationship the time it requires too many people they treat their partner like

[00:31:47] an off-night backstreet well I have all this stuff to do and I'm working 80 hours and then I

[00:31:52] got to go out for a beer with the guys and yeah I'll see you right no if you were in a partnership

[00:31:58] the partnership comes first because that is what feeds you right for the rest of your life right

[00:32:07] right I love that yes I love that that's I came home today to dinner being cooked

[00:32:16] and that was a welcome break um I didn't have to ask but that need was met thank you

[00:32:25] you're welcome I will never let Carl do that Carl can I cook

[00:32:30] I will let him I let him do the dishes and snooching for doing it

[00:32:35] stay out of my kitchen well I hadn't done it in a while and I was thinking now I've been

[00:32:41] because I'm on vacation this week I've been off all day hadn't really done anything

[00:32:47] and I actually went to the store got all the way home and said you know what let me go buy

[00:32:54] get some food to cook because I knew she had a dog you angel pie man

[00:33:01] just trying to you know yep and those things um the used you said put your relationship first

[00:33:09] that's one thing that we have done from the beginning and I give us credit for that

[00:33:16] I I don't know other than our feelings for each other where that would come from at least

[00:33:23] from my perspective I just knew that I loved him and I wanted to be with him and I wanted it

[00:33:28] to last and so we always put each other first um and I think that we're here today because

[00:33:37] we've we've gone through so much but we've always maintained that um that commitment to each other

[00:33:45] to the relationship so so we have the the purpose we have relationships and then the

[00:33:52] spiritual is the third leg yeah look I tell people when I read them I do not care if you are

[00:34:02] Christian Jewish Buddhist Muslim pagan Hindu believe him we're all for Wonder Dog

[00:34:08] but with me you do have to believe somebody up there loves you once the best for you and is

[00:34:12] willing to work with you because I did the cancer dance three times and I don't think I got off

[00:34:17] the dance floor all by my little ones is right so however you see spirit make that connection

[00:34:27] you will feel less alone you will get when I say get messages it's not like I'm channeling something

[00:34:38] but you know I often say the world is like one big tarot card and tarot cards can have

[00:34:45] allegories for instance there's a card called the tower and it shows a tower in flame and

[00:34:52] people pulling off and a lot of readers say it's doom and gloom and destruction I say no it's

[00:34:57] might be in floating sports stadium okay right Boston Red Sats want to build a new stadium

[00:35:02] they got to blow up then we first so if your life is falling apart think of tower card

[00:35:10] where do you need to clear the ground to rebuild something better oh I like that and when you

[00:35:17] get really stuck I give people the deity on the mountain exercise okay pretend that you are a

[00:35:27] hundred foot god and you are standing on a cliff a half a mile above a city and you're kind of

[00:35:36] overlooking things and you see the births the deaths and the alliances and the squabbles

[00:35:40] and the marriages and divorces but because you see it in an overview you see the patterns you're not

[00:35:47] stuck in the middle of it so when you're in a tough situation get quiet get centered go upstairs which

[00:35:55] is what I call it and imagine that you are that god or goddess on a mountain and see what you can

[00:36:03] see from patternings remember the compassion that spirit has for us compassion you know

[00:36:13] it's I admit we are little desmos on a tiny planet on the end of a middling galaxy I don't think

[00:36:33] so you too have to think from the point of view of compassion reality and the overview

[00:36:41] you will get more in touch with spirit at that point you will get more in touch with your own spirit

[00:36:48] and you will strengthen that third leg so that you have a solid foundation under life

[00:36:55] and when you have a solid foundation under life that's going to make your partnership better too

[00:36:59] yes that's awesome yes it is that's awesome so I don't even know where to go from there

[00:37:09] I mean well I wanted to delve into this for our listeners we have some

[00:37:18] traditional thinking of people that may follow us who you know are tied up into one of the

[00:37:26] religions they may look at things because even before in my walk I was a Christian and

[00:37:37] things like tarot cards were like you know well that's the work of the devil that's you know

[00:37:43] that's evil I know can you share with our listeners as well as us and inform us

[00:37:50] the importance of terrible readings and how they can enhance one's life well for one thing I'm not a

[00:38:00] fortune teller right it's key um and I tell my clients don't ask yes or no questions because

[00:38:08] that sets you up always ask how so for instance if you said I'm going to open up a vintage

[00:38:17] clothing store how do I make it really go then the cards are allegories and I might pull a card for you

[00:38:26] a card for the energy around the business the brick and mortar location it might be good to look for

[00:38:30] how to market it clients competition staff finances what you need to know and best possible

[00:38:35] outcome why can I do that because I used to be an executive recruiter and I put people in six

[00:38:40] bigger jobs so you're getting both halves of my brain you have done it all

[00:38:53] sports but the thing is I started doing this full time when all of a sudden I could do hands-on

[00:39:03] healing and talk to dead people with no training for me that was spirit handing me my draft

[00:39:08] notice and saying we need you to do some work down there people need to know what's going on

[00:39:12] right and for people who say this is bad I just say uh act chapter two anybody even such as I do

[00:39:20] so can you right I am not doing this because I want to get rich and famous I'm doing this

[00:39:28] because it is service to people right I say I take my work seriously but me not so much

[00:39:35] that's awesome that's beautiful that's beautiful and I can just tell that you love what you do

[00:39:42] I do you just it radiates through in your voice and you know with the sarcasm that I love thank you

[00:39:53] but when people laugh their shields go down and the information gets in yeah it's wonderful for

[00:40:00] them right so now we have those three parts what do we do once we've done that work

[00:40:10] and it's we're fortified and we're ready to go forth and and be productive with it

[00:40:19] you stay in the present moment today I woke up healthy today I had food on the table today

[00:40:28] my partner kissed me goodbye before I went to work today I was able to bring a sandwich

[00:40:36] to someone homeless and sit and eat my lunch with them today I stopped one kid from bullying another

[00:40:43] today I made a difference that's what you do no matter what your job is there is a way

[00:40:52] to be kind to the world in it like that yeah I like that yeah just imagine if if everybody

[00:41:03] decided to do that that would be doing maybe someday but we have to model it

[00:41:11] because maybe by modeling it someone is going to see it and change their lives right that's how it works

[00:41:22] so parting wisdom for us for our listeners if we didn't pay attention to anything else

[00:41:29] what's what's the one thing that we need to take from this conversation I want you to always ask

[00:41:35] yourself three questions when you're upset or something what am I x about x is whatever that

[00:41:41] emotion is angry sad afraid depressed then why am I x about that really look at your feelings and see

[00:41:50] if you can figure out why but ask yourself the question we always forget what do I think

[00:41:56] what happened if I stopped being x about that called stimulus belief response you are allowed to change

[00:42:04] in the moment just because you've always been this way in a situation doesn't mean you can't change it

[00:42:09] right now see what that does I like it I love it all right so where can our listeners get

[00:42:20] more information about you about your books and about getting our lives together oh Margaret they

[00:42:28] can't avoid me they really can't because it's Corby Midlife everywhere my website is Corby Midlife you

[00:42:34] can find me Pinterest Instagram YouTube Facebook is all Corby Midlife that's all you have to make

[00:42:43] sure we have the spelling and everything there thank you your links there and follow you and bug you

[00:42:54] hey look I gotta find a reason to come back down to Rusyn Shushi so there you are go come on baby

[00:43:01] you come always welcome always well it was wonderful so we'd like to thank you for joining us

[00:43:09] we we've enjoyed it we appreciate it um we're gonna make sure that your information is there

[00:43:15] we will make sure that we are following and and learning from your wisdom because there's so much

[00:43:22] so we appreciate you gotta get you it was a real pleasure to be here thank you you are a

[00:43:30] phenomenal woman yes you are thank you never never thanks for joining us on this episode of the beyond

[00:43:49] our due podcast please make sure to like this episode and also subscribe to our podcast you can