Meet the Thorells!

[00:00:03] After over 25 years of marriage, we've learned that successful couples have great friendships,

[00:00:09] put each other first, and focus on life just as much as love.

[00:00:13] We believe marriage should be fun and easy.

[00:00:16] Our goal is to share our journey with the hopes of helping others build strong, happy

[00:00:21] relationships.

[00:00:22] Join us as we continue to create our lives beyond I do.

[00:00:33] We are not marriage counselors nor are we mental health professionals.

[00:00:36] We're just simply sharing how we navigate it through our marriage.

[00:00:39] Now on with the show.

[00:00:49] Welcome back to the Beyond I Do podcast and we'd like to welcome our guests that we have

[00:00:53] with us.

[00:00:54] We have Mr. and Mrs. Tracy and Tabitha Thorell.

[00:00:59] They come to us from Nebraska.

[00:01:02] Serial entrepreneurs, a farmer and life and business coach.

[00:01:09] Home innovations.

[00:01:10] But most importantly.

[00:01:12] Most intriguing for me is parent to five girls.

[00:01:16] Yep.

[00:01:17] Yes, girls.

[00:01:18] So we are going to ask that you tell us a little bit about yourselves and tell

[00:01:23] us a little bit about the beginning of your love story.

[00:01:26] Yeah.

[00:01:27] Do you want me to start?

[00:01:29] Go ahead.

[00:01:30] All right.

[00:01:31] That's right.

[00:01:32] Well, thank you guys so much for having us.

[00:01:35] We're very honored to come and share a story with whoever is willing to listen.

[00:01:40] But yeah, we're Tabitha and Tracy Thorell.

[00:01:43] We met in high school.

[00:01:44] We're high school sweethearts.

[00:01:45] I was 15 and he was 17, which is crazy because our oldest daughter is almost 15.

[00:01:51] And so I'm like, oh my gosh, I was her age when I met, you know, and so that's

[00:01:56] a like a that's a trip for another day.

[00:01:59] But we know it's just funny.

[00:02:03] I always tell the story.

[00:02:04] But when I met him, I just knew we'd get married someday.

[00:02:08] And people think that it was just crazy puppy love.

[00:02:10] But it was like an intuition.

[00:02:11] And I remember telling his best friend, I said, hey, if you would just date me, we

[00:02:16] will get married.

[00:02:17] And thinking about that, that's why they sounded so crazy.

[00:02:22] But like, I was so serious.

[00:02:24] It was like God put this in me.

[00:02:26] And it wasn't that I thought, you know, we, you know, instantly like be, you

[00:02:30] know, 16 and 18 getting married.

[00:02:33] It was like, I just saw a vision of our life.

[00:02:36] And that's just kind of how it's always been.

[00:02:38] I'm a very spiritual person and God has put visions and intuition into my heart

[00:02:44] on different things.

[00:02:45] And we always knew we wanted a family.

[00:02:48] So we were like, OK, we're really united in our values and what we wanted

[00:02:53] to see happen.

[00:02:56] Neither one of us like to work for other people.

[00:02:58] So we're like, let's be entrepreneurs.

[00:03:02] I always tell people it's just because I'm so stubborn that I don't like

[00:03:06] work for other people.

[00:03:07] Right.

[00:03:08] Yeah.

[00:03:09] So our journey began really with the entrepreneurial journey was I was 19, he

[00:03:13] was 21 and we bought our first real estate.

[00:03:16] Tracy, his dad had bought some about six years prior to that and he had

[00:03:22] helped kind of build up his dad's real estate property, managing

[00:03:25] renovations, rental.

[00:03:27] And he saw the potential there.

[00:03:29] And I was like, yeah, let's do this.

[00:03:31] And so we got a property and I helped him renovate it.

[00:03:35] And we rented out the top and he lived in the bottom.

[00:03:38] I lived in a different house, but he lived in the bottom and is able to pay

[00:03:42] for his own rent and actually be cash flow from the time he was 21.

[00:03:47] So that kind of the beginning of the real entrepreneurial real estate

[00:03:52] vision.

[00:03:53] I was just kind of along for the ride.

[00:03:54] I just like to make things pretty.

[00:03:56] I'm like, you can deal with the money.

[00:03:57] I love to make it all pretty.

[00:03:59] We learned really early on though that you make a rental property pretty and

[00:04:03] the college students like to wreck that vision.

[00:04:05] Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, tear it up.

[00:04:08] Yeah, that's amazing to me.

[00:04:10] We were 22 and 23 when we got so and that was too young in my opinion,

[00:04:17] especially looking at our children now, like you said, they're that age.

[00:04:21] And I'm like, we had you to take care of and you're not taking care of

[00:04:24] you.

[00:04:26] I can imagine.

[00:04:27] I'm trying to take we weren't married like when he bought the first property,

[00:04:31] we weren't married yet.

[00:04:32] We were still in college and so he lived in the basement and rented out the

[00:04:37] top and I lived actually one of his dad's properties.

[00:04:40] Okay, but we helped renovate it, work it together that type of thing.

[00:04:44] He was more the business side because at that point in my life, I was

[00:04:49] getting a degree in marriage and family studies.

[00:04:51] I always had a desire to help family unit state together in a positive way

[00:04:56] and he was more the business, but I just like to make things pretty.

[00:05:00] So we both had that kind of vision of like renovations and things.

[00:05:03] So that's kind of where the dynamic came from and I saw a vision of

[00:05:07] entrepreneurship.

[00:05:08] I saw that as a way we actually thought that we would be real estate

[00:05:13] agents when we were in college.

[00:05:15] I was getting a degree, but we decided we were going to get our

[00:05:18] degrees and then we were going to both get a real estate license.

[00:05:21] And so that was kind of the beginning vision of kind of the real

[00:05:25] estate stuff.

[00:05:26] We both saw that as a way to earn income, to change lives, change our

[00:05:31] own lives, build a legacy that was planted.

[00:05:35] Yeah, they're almost yeah, two decades ago.

[00:05:37] Okay.

[00:05:38] Wow.

[00:05:38] Wow.

[00:05:38] That's fantastic.

[00:05:39] Wow.

[00:05:39] That's and I'm sitting here thinking, gosh, we were we were

[00:05:44] really late bloomers.

[00:05:47] No, we made it was different because my first tenants, they

[00:05:52] were all older than I was and like, you know, one of the

[00:05:58] guys, do you have a written day?

[00:06:01] No.

[00:06:01] Okay.

[00:06:01] All right.

[00:06:02] Yeah.

[00:06:03] I mean they they I remember being put in a situation where

[00:06:09] two tenants were fighting with each other that are a couple

[00:06:11] of girls and then parents came into the deal and then they

[00:06:16] come to me and like what are we going to do?

[00:06:18] And I'm like, you guys are all older than me.

[00:06:25] You like, did you figure this out?

[00:06:28] Right?

[00:06:29] Y'all are the parents.

[00:06:30] Yeah.

[00:06:32] I remember the parents asked me like, well, what are we

[00:06:34] going to do?

[00:06:34] And I'm like, I don't know.

[00:06:37] I mean, wait, let me call my dad and see.

[00:06:42] I just that's a maid.

[00:06:43] Like I said at 22 and 23, we started, you know, we had our

[00:06:48] son and looking back now.

[00:06:51] I'm like, gosh, that was young and that level of responsibility

[00:06:56] is it's mind-blowing.

[00:06:57] So to have that type of thinking at that age, that's

[00:07:02] that's amazing.

[00:07:03] And then you set out to do it and here you are like

[00:07:07] you said decades later and you know, that's grown and

[00:07:11] flourished.

[00:07:11] So that's amazing.

[00:07:13] So how long have you when you said you weren't married with

[00:07:16] the first rental property?

[00:07:18] How long before you all decided, okay, it's time to settle

[00:07:21] down and make it forever.

[00:07:25] Well, so we got married in 2007, November 2007 and you

[00:07:32] know, I knew I wanted to marry her but I was I was just

[00:07:36] waiting until I was done with college and as soon as I

[00:07:39] was done then then I asked her and she wanted it done sooner

[00:07:43] than that.

[00:07:44] But I'm impatient.

[00:07:48] We dated for seven years and I like I I was planning it

[00:07:52] all along.

[00:07:53] I was just wanting to be done and being able to provide

[00:07:56] for her because I knew that we were going to need a place

[00:07:59] to live and I was going to have to work and I had a job

[00:08:04] nailed down and you know, I was ready to have her live

[00:08:07] in the basement with me.

[00:08:09] Introduce her to the good life.

[00:08:16] I was going to move her to a nicer basement.

[00:08:20] Welcome to the underworld.

[00:08:23] Do you?

[00:08:23] Yes.

[00:08:25] Yeah, I mean, I knew all along.

[00:08:28] I you know, I had the ring for months, you know, when

[00:08:32] I first started making money that was first thing about

[00:08:34] so.

[00:08:35] Oh, that's awesome.

[00:08:37] That's awesome.

[00:08:38] Yeah, and so I was 22 when we got married and he was 24

[00:08:45] and we decided he had gotten a degree and he had gotten

[00:08:49] a job that he had an internship with and so we

[00:08:52] moved back to his hometown.

[00:08:54] We got married and we lived in my parents basement

[00:08:56] for a couple of minutes.

[00:08:58] Wow, fantastic.

[00:09:01] For being honest and a house came available and it was

[00:09:05] funny because this house came available.

[00:09:06] It was really cute and the people had done a lot of

[00:09:08] work to it and just my mindset my vision or I walk

[00:09:12] in there and I'm like I'll do this and I'll do this

[00:09:14] and all that you know, and just like right away.

[00:09:16] That was our first like project as a married couple

[00:09:19] was that home and we renovated that when we purchased

[00:09:23] it and he worked for another company and then he decided

[00:09:27] he was going to come and work on the family farm and

[00:09:30] which is an entrepreneurship in its way, but you're

[00:09:32] still kind of tied to other people.

[00:09:36] So for me he was providing and he was doing what

[00:09:40] he needed to do, you know to provide it, you

[00:09:43] know a home and food and shelter and money so

[00:09:46] we could buy more income properties.

[00:09:48] But my mindset was what can I do to help supplement

[00:09:52] like because I love the beach and we live in

[00:09:54] Nebraska and there's no beaches and I was like

[00:09:57] we're going to be doing these vacation because all

[00:09:59] of his income.

[00:10:00] We wanted it to go towards, you know our living

[00:10:03] expenses and then invest in real estate.

[00:10:05] We knew that all the extra money that was an

[00:10:08] investment.

[00:10:09] We just didn't want to be like, you know,

[00:10:11] spinning out on like random stuff, you know,

[00:10:14] like even patients and stuff.

[00:10:15] So I figured out ways that I could earn money

[00:10:19] to do be able to do the fun stuff, you know,

[00:10:21] and that was kind of the dynamic for a while

[00:10:23] was like I wasn't business minded, but I really

[00:10:27] was and I just didn't realize it and it was

[00:10:29] just a label.

[00:10:30] I put on myself, you know, I think so many times

[00:10:32] like when you grow up you you think the

[00:10:36] wealthy or businessman is woman is a certain

[00:10:39] way and I wanted to be a mom but we also

[00:10:42] wanted a level of life that was different than

[00:10:45] where we were at right and so that began my

[00:10:48] journey and God transforming my mind of like

[00:10:52] Oh, you can sell sandwiches to the harvest farmers

[00:10:55] and you can earn an extra, you know, four to

[00:10:57] five hundred dollars.

[00:10:58] Oh well that can be a trip to this experience

[00:11:01] and then oh I can actually travel and do

[00:11:04] those things.

[00:11:04] Oh, I am that person, you know, so it

[00:11:06] just like slowly expanded our mind and then

[00:11:09] I got involved with a network marketing company

[00:11:12] that really expanded my mind on like leadership

[00:11:16] and money and what that meant and like all

[00:11:20] of those things and that was in 2012 and

[00:11:23] that was after our second daughter was born

[00:11:25] and that's when things really changed right

[00:11:29] like that's when we were like, okay, we got

[00:11:32] to by that time.

[00:11:34] Do we have the second property in 2012?

[00:11:37] Yeah, so I had two properties before we

[00:11:41] got married.

[00:11:42] Okay.

[00:11:42] Yeah, and then we had the property at the

[00:11:45] lake and yeah, we had it.

[00:11:47] So we had like three or four properties at

[00:11:49] this time, but I wanted him home more because

[00:11:52] far he was gone all the time and there were

[00:11:55] be times when he'd be gone and the kids

[00:11:57] would be sleeping and he come home and

[00:11:58] they'd be sleeping and I had a dad that

[00:12:01] worked like that and our relationship was

[00:12:03] rocky my full life until I was an adult

[00:12:05] and I didn't want that for him.

[00:12:07] So I was on a mission to bring home income

[00:12:10] that could match his because I was like I

[00:12:13] want him home more.

[00:12:14] I want the kids.

[00:12:15] I want him to experience those things and

[00:12:17] He wanted that as well, but he is a provider.

[00:12:20] He's going to do whatever it takes right and

[00:12:22] this is why I always tell people hard work

[00:12:25] is not going to make you wealthy.

[00:12:26] I wish it did.

[00:12:27] I really really wish it did but if it

[00:12:30] did my dad and my husband would be the

[00:12:33] wealthiest people on the planet because

[00:12:36] they are blue collar workers who work

[00:12:38] their fingers from sun up to sun down

[00:12:41] and they are barely getting by and they

[00:12:44] are the most integrists loyal hard-working

[00:12:48] men that I know and it infuriates me

[00:12:51] because I'm like we were taught just

[00:12:54] hard work hard work hard work and this

[00:12:56] morning.

[00:12:56] It was funny because I was listening to

[00:12:59] I listen to different motivational speeches

[00:13:01] and stuff, you know, and they were

[00:13:02] talking about the Millennials and how

[00:13:04] they have all this stuff at their

[00:13:06] fingertips and if they could just take

[00:13:09] what they have at their fingertips

[00:13:11] and then their parents and their

[00:13:12] grandparents work ethic and it hit me.

[00:13:15] I said it's not about working harder.

[00:13:17] It's having that work ethic and

[00:13:19] working harder, right?

[00:13:21] And that's what God was showing me

[00:13:23] from 2012 to even now of expanding our

[00:13:26] mind and expanding our wealth with

[00:13:29] like the online coaching stuff that

[00:13:31] I've been doing even with network

[00:13:32] marketing investing in ourselves doing

[00:13:35] these podcasts with people just expanding

[00:13:38] the knowledge and working smarter in

[00:13:41] it and that is what work ethic is.

[00:13:43] It's not just going out and trying

[00:13:46] to move the boulder with your heart.

[00:13:48] You go out and you get the leverage,

[00:13:50] right?

[00:13:50] You get that to buy or you get the

[00:13:52] the machine that's going to push the

[00:13:54] boulder and that has been the biggest

[00:13:56] shift and I'd say in probably the

[00:13:58] last five years for us to is working

[00:14:01] smarter not harder because we were

[00:14:04] already working as hard as we possibly

[00:14:06] could right now.

[00:14:07] It's raising the kids and trying to

[00:14:09] do the side hustle from home.

[00:14:11] He was doing, you know farming from

[00:14:14] sun up from sundown and you know doing

[00:14:16] the real estate stuff and I'm trying

[00:14:18] to do the real estate stuff and my

[00:14:20] network marketing and the three kids

[00:14:22] and then we had two more and you

[00:14:24] know, there was a lot going on.

[00:14:29] It was you know, there still is

[00:14:30] but it's it's funny because when

[00:14:32] we had that shift it was like I

[00:14:35] don't want to say it became easier

[00:14:36] because that's like a cop-out because

[00:14:37] it's not easy but it came with more

[00:14:40] ease right more peace and joy even

[00:14:44] now like we're in a really hard

[00:14:46] season because 2023 for farming was

[00:14:49] just really rough for us.

[00:14:51] But even for me, I know he feels

[00:14:53] a lot of the financial stress,

[00:14:54] but even for me with what we've

[00:14:57] changed in our mind.

[00:14:59] It's like it's okay.

[00:15:01] Like if there's like this piece

[00:15:03] and like this is that I know

[00:15:05] it's just it's going to be fine.

[00:15:08] And I'm just trusting that process.

[00:15:10] Right.

[00:15:11] That's something that you know,

[00:15:12] we recently come into our minds

[00:15:15] about, you know, just the thought

[00:15:18] process used to be what I want

[00:15:19] to work hard because I want

[00:15:22] to have this I want to have that

[00:15:24] and it transferred from things

[00:15:27] to what's more important our freedom

[00:15:30] right our ability to do what

[00:15:31] we want to do when we want to

[00:15:33] do it.

[00:15:34] So yes, it may be struggle in

[00:15:37] the beginning because you're

[00:15:39] still transferring your mind.

[00:15:41] Okay, I want to do this instead

[00:15:43] of getting this like yeah,

[00:15:46] I wanted the like, you know,

[00:15:47] I work with a lot of guys,

[00:15:48] you know, man when I get

[00:15:50] up to 50, I'm gonna buy me

[00:15:52] a Corvette, you know, that's

[00:15:53] like Corvette.

[00:15:55] All right now I got the Corvette.

[00:15:57] What you gonna do now?

[00:15:58] All right.

[00:15:59] Well, you got the Corvette and

[00:16:00] man, I can't even drive the

[00:16:01] car cuz I got to work in the

[00:16:03] pink. Right?

[00:16:05] Right?

[00:16:06] What you gonna have that time?

[00:16:08] And I can't even get into the

[00:16:09] Corvette because my back hurts

[00:16:10] so bad because I never hear

[00:16:12] my elephant.

[00:16:13] You broke your back making

[00:16:14] the money to buy the Corvette.

[00:16:16] They can't even get into and

[00:16:17] it's like not even comfortable.

[00:16:19] The seats are so hard.

[00:16:20] You can't even, you know,

[00:16:21] and I barely even drive anything

[00:16:23] now.

[00:16:23] It's like yeah.

[00:16:24] Okay.

[00:16:25] Same.

[00:16:26] You spend your health to make

[00:16:28] your wealth and then you spend

[00:16:30] your wealth to make, fix your

[00:16:31] right.

[00:16:33] That's so cool.

[00:16:35] And in the meantime, all your

[00:16:36] relationships are turned to

[00:16:37] crap, you know, because you

[00:16:39] don't have time energy or

[00:16:41] effort to put out.

[00:16:43] And that's what we didn't

[00:16:45] want. That was the thing like

[00:16:46] I always think somebody asked

[00:16:48] me what would I I was on a

[00:16:50] podcast yesterday and they

[00:16:51] said, what would you if you

[00:16:53] could change something or do

[00:16:54] something differently?

[00:16:56] And I said, you know, you

[00:16:57] could always done the should

[00:16:58] or would have could have.

[00:16:58] We always talk about we wish

[00:16:59] we would have bought more

[00:17:00] real estate early and all

[00:17:01] that stuff. But I said we're

[00:17:03] where we are meant to be on

[00:17:05] purpose. And if I take that

[00:17:07] road, if we would have went

[00:17:09] there faster, we could have

[00:17:10] lost relationships. Our

[00:17:12] marriage could have suffered.

[00:17:13] We wanted financial success

[00:17:15] and business success and

[00:17:16] impact for me anyway, but

[00:17:19] I didn't want to do it and

[00:17:20] give up my health. I

[00:17:21] didn't want to do it and

[00:17:22] give up my relationships. So

[00:17:24] we had to slow down in

[00:17:26] order to speed up like I

[00:17:28] feel like this next decade

[00:17:30] for us is going to be

[00:17:32] crazy in the sense of

[00:17:34] financial, but because we

[00:17:35] built a strong foundation

[00:17:37] of our marriage, right?

[00:17:39] Our health how to handle

[00:17:41] being healthy and nutritious

[00:17:44] and fit in those things

[00:17:45] because we have a 14 year

[00:17:47] old and we have a one

[00:17:48] year old. So it's like

[00:17:49] we got to be fit for that

[00:17:50] one year old. I don't

[00:17:51] want to be that old. Let's

[00:17:52] hear it. You know, it's

[00:17:53] like I want to be fit. I

[00:17:55] want I don't care if we're

[00:17:57] multimillionaires if we're

[00:17:58] fighting all the time. If

[00:18:00] we don't have a passionate

[00:18:01] loving friendship connection.

[00:18:04] What's the point like for

[00:18:06] me money? That's not you

[00:18:07] know, the money is just

[00:18:09] what I get to do and have

[00:18:10] fun stuff and give it

[00:18:11] like bless people and you

[00:18:13] know go on trips and

[00:18:14] beaches and our Dream House

[00:18:16] and stuff for our grandkids

[00:18:18] and all those things but

[00:18:19] like I'm not going to

[00:18:20] give that up to give this

[00:18:23] up in order to have that

[00:18:25] we didn't know that really

[00:18:26] early on. Yeah. Yeah. I

[00:18:28] love the hard work is not

[00:18:31] necessarily equivalent to

[00:18:33] wealth because he's like

[00:18:35] that as well and desire

[00:18:38] to provide that drive to

[00:18:40] provide there have been

[00:18:42] times. He was laid off

[00:18:44] and I was pregnant with

[00:18:46] our second child and I

[00:18:49] we had talked about it

[00:18:50] and I was in a work

[00:18:52] environment that was very

[00:18:53] stressful. And so we

[00:18:55] decided that I would come

[00:18:56] home because I'm pregnant,

[00:18:59] you know, and we already

[00:19:01] had a little one. I had

[00:19:03] stayed home with him

[00:19:04] initially and so my first

[00:19:07] day officially not working

[00:19:09] anymore. I'm in bed.

[00:19:11] I'm asleep. He was

[00:19:12] working at a chemical

[00:19:14] plant and he was getting

[00:19:15] off that morning and he

[00:19:17] walked in and he leans

[00:19:19] down by the bed and he

[00:19:21] looking face to face when

[00:19:22] I open my eyes. He said

[00:19:23] baby, I got laid off

[00:19:27] and so really I can't even

[00:19:30] have one day.

[00:19:33] He he put he got a

[00:19:36] bucket. He got dish soap

[00:19:38] and sponge and the

[00:19:41] what are they called

[00:19:42] shop rags and he was

[00:19:44] going around to office

[00:19:45] buildings and he's washing

[00:19:47] cars and he's doing

[00:19:48] these things to provide

[00:19:50] so that's in a need urge

[00:19:53] to provide he.

[00:19:55] Oh, yeah.

[00:19:56] So I love that you said

[00:19:58] that because that didn't

[00:20:00] that hard work ethic

[00:20:02] didn't equate.

[00:20:04] Okay.

[00:20:04] Well the baby count

[00:20:05] shows that exactly

[00:20:07] yes to be a wage like

[00:20:09] you said to work smarter

[00:20:10] not harder and

[00:20:12] unfortunately, it's taking

[00:20:13] us longer to realize

[00:20:16] that and we're just now

[00:20:17] starting to see those

[00:20:18] things and to be open

[00:20:20] to those opportunities.

[00:20:22] I knew that ever since

[00:20:24] that incident I've been

[00:20:25] at my current job

[00:20:27] that I am working

[00:20:29] now and but I'm

[00:20:31] looking at all these

[00:20:32] guys, you know,

[00:20:34] it's an old mill.

[00:20:35] So some guys are in

[00:20:36] their 70s and still

[00:20:37] working.

[00:20:39] I don't want to be that

[00:20:40] guy.

[00:20:41] Right.

[00:20:41] Well, that was his

[00:20:42] thing.

[00:20:43] He was doing construction

[00:20:44] and tell him like so

[00:20:47] I went to school for

[00:20:48] construction management.

[00:20:51] My I my dad said

[00:20:54] go to school for anything

[00:20:55] other than learning how

[00:20:56] to farm.

[00:20:58] You know how to do that

[00:20:59] already.

[00:20:59] So I did that.

[00:21:01] I thought, you know,

[00:21:02] it goes well with

[00:21:03] what I was already

[00:21:03] doing.

[00:21:04] We you know,

[00:21:05] I was working on his

[00:21:06] rental properties

[00:21:07] when I wasn't,

[00:21:08] you know farming in

[00:21:09] high school.

[00:21:11] So we would we would

[00:21:12] do both of those jobs.

[00:21:14] But so I had to

[00:21:16] do an internship to

[00:21:17] finish out my college

[00:21:19] and from that internship,

[00:21:21] I was offered a job

[00:21:22] right away and it

[00:21:23] was, you know,

[00:21:24] way more money than

[00:21:25] I'd ever earned before.

[00:21:27] So I wasn't sure

[00:21:30] if there was enough

[00:21:31] room on the farm for

[00:21:32] me.

[00:21:33] You know,

[00:21:33] I have an older

[00:21:34] brother.

[00:21:34] He has the son

[00:21:36] and I knew,

[00:21:37] you know,

[00:21:37] we were all going

[00:21:38] to be involved

[00:21:38] with the farm

[00:21:39] and it's and it's

[00:21:40] it's hard to make

[00:21:41] it on the farm.

[00:21:42] So, you know,

[00:21:43] I I was just kind

[00:21:44] of thinking,

[00:21:45] you know,

[00:21:45] maybe I can do

[00:21:47] something else

[00:21:48] and maybe eventually

[00:21:51] farm,

[00:21:51] you know,

[00:21:52] because I want

[00:21:53] but so I took

[00:21:55] the job and,

[00:21:57] you know,

[00:21:57] working with

[00:21:59] those guys,

[00:22:00] you know,

[00:22:01] you leave before

[00:22:02] the sun comes up

[00:22:03] because you want to

[00:22:04] start when the

[00:22:05] sun comes up

[00:22:06] and you work

[00:22:07] until the sun

[00:22:07] goes down.

[00:22:08] It's different from

[00:22:09] farming because

[00:22:10] your job might

[00:22:12] be two hours away

[00:22:13] from where you're

[00:22:14] you're,

[00:22:15] where you're living.

[00:22:16] So you might

[00:22:17] have to go

[00:22:18] live in a hotel

[00:22:19] during the week

[00:22:20] or something like

[00:22:21] that or a camper.

[00:22:22] So you are really

[00:22:24] removed from your

[00:22:24] family,

[00:22:25] but I made it,

[00:22:27] you know,

[00:22:27] I went through

[00:22:28] the first year

[00:22:29] and then during

[00:22:30] the winter we

[00:22:31] worked in a shop,

[00:22:33] you know,

[00:22:33] repairing equipment

[00:22:34] and it was a lot

[00:22:35] of wasted time.

[00:22:36] But I remember

[00:22:38] sitting down.

[00:22:39] The guys were

[00:22:40] having coffee

[00:22:41] and I was just

[00:22:41] looking around

[00:22:42] the room

[00:22:43] skinning these

[00:22:45] guys and it's like

[00:22:47] failed marriage,

[00:22:48] failed marriage,

[00:22:50] child going to

[00:22:51] jail,

[00:22:51] failed marriage,

[00:22:53] you know,

[00:22:53] and

[00:22:54] two failed marriages,

[00:22:56] you know,

[00:22:58] and I started

[00:22:58] looking at that

[00:22:59] and on top of

[00:23:01] feeling like

[00:23:03] I was just

[00:23:04] dying inside

[00:23:04] because

[00:23:06] I was thinking

[00:23:06] of all these things

[00:23:08] that I wanted to do,

[00:23:09] but I was not

[00:23:10] able to do.

[00:23:10] I was,

[00:23:11] I had to go

[00:23:12] to this

[00:23:13] dingy dark shop

[00:23:14] every day

[00:23:14] and kind of

[00:23:16] stand around

[00:23:17] just to get my

[00:23:17] paycheck

[00:23:18] because we had

[00:23:18] already finished

[00:23:19] all of our work

[00:23:20] for the winter

[00:23:21] in the first month,

[00:23:22] you know,

[00:23:22] like you're

[00:23:22] dying with them,

[00:23:23] like,

[00:23:24] yes,

[00:23:25] you're dying

[00:23:25] and you're

[00:23:26] dying.

[00:23:27] Yep.

[00:23:27] I just remember

[00:23:28] staring out,

[00:23:29] you know,

[00:23:29] this little glass

[00:23:30] window in the

[00:23:31] shop garage door

[00:23:33] just thinking like

[00:23:35] I'm making

[00:23:36] this guy

[00:23:36] a million dollars

[00:23:37] and I could be

[00:23:38] at home

[00:23:39] or on my own

[00:23:40] making my own

[00:23:41] million dollars.

[00:23:42] I might as

[00:23:42] well get out of here

[00:23:43] and then

[00:23:44] shortly after that

[00:23:46] my dad realized

[00:23:47] that

[00:23:48] I had helped him

[00:23:49] build up

[00:23:50] all these rentals

[00:23:51] that he had.

[00:23:52] He had his farming

[00:23:53] besides

[00:23:55] that.

[00:23:55] My older brother

[00:23:56] was kind of

[00:23:57] separating himself

[00:23:59] from my dad

[00:24:00] so he could do

[00:24:00] his own thing.

[00:24:02] My parents realized

[00:24:03] that

[00:24:04] they had a lot of work

[00:24:05] and not much help

[00:24:06] to do it.

[00:24:06] They were

[00:24:08] they were tired.

[00:24:09] So,

[00:24:10] so I came home

[00:24:11] and helped my dad

[00:24:12] with that

[00:24:13] and then I was able

[00:24:13] to start

[00:24:14] farming on my own

[00:24:15] and

[00:24:16] get back to

[00:24:17] to building the

[00:24:19] real estate

[00:24:20] business that I would make.

[00:24:21] Fantastic.

[00:24:22] That's fantastic.

[00:24:23] So,

[00:24:24] one thing that

[00:24:26] Pavitha you mentioned

[00:24:28] twice you said

[00:24:29] something about friendship

[00:24:30] when it comes to

[00:24:31] your relationship

[00:24:33] and that's one of our

[00:24:34] big things is

[00:24:36] we're friends

[00:24:37] and we cultivate

[00:24:38] that friendship

[00:24:39] just as much

[00:24:40] as we cultivate

[00:24:41] our marriage.

[00:24:42] Yep.

[00:24:43] Yep.

[00:24:44] Throughout these ups

[00:24:45] and downs

[00:24:46] and these changes

[00:24:47] and entrepreneurship

[00:24:48] and five girls

[00:24:49] what types of things

[00:24:51] do you all do

[00:24:52] to make sure that you're

[00:24:52] connecting as a couple?

[00:24:55] I try to make her laugh

[00:24:56] at least once a day.

[00:24:58] He doesn't know that

[00:24:59] but

[00:25:00] that's a good one.

[00:25:03] We're complete opposite

[00:25:04] personality types.

[00:25:05] We are very opposite.

[00:25:06] Yeah.

[00:25:06] Like I mean

[00:25:07] like night and day

[00:25:08] I'm obviously the talker.

[00:25:10] I mean shocker.

[00:25:10] During the podcast

[00:25:11] there's a reason why

[00:25:12] she's sitting in the big chair

[00:25:14] right here

[00:25:16] on the side chair.

[00:25:18] I got a big chair

[00:25:19] but you know

[00:25:21] but here's the thing

[00:25:22] people know that about me

[00:25:23] but I say like

[00:25:24] but he's the one who leads our family.

[00:25:26] Like I'm kind of the front person

[00:25:28] because I'm loud

[00:25:29] and like that's my personality type

[00:25:31] and I like to talk

[00:25:32] and I'm good at it

[00:25:32] and it's a gift

[00:25:33] and that's all the thing

[00:25:34] but he is the one that

[00:25:35] leads our family

[00:25:36] and leads our girls

[00:25:37] and he is like

[00:25:38] that quiet leadership

[00:25:39] and I think that's so

[00:25:41] like it's that stoic

[00:25:42] and it's so appealing

[00:25:44] because

[00:25:45] it's non-threatening

[00:25:46] but it's still so strong

[00:25:47] and powerful

[00:25:48] so it's like I have to preface that

[00:25:49] because some people think

[00:25:51] because of my strong personality

[00:25:52] that like I just walk all over him

[00:25:54] and I'm like

[00:25:54] no

[00:25:55] I mean

[00:25:56] could I

[00:25:57] probably

[00:25:58] but I learned really early on

[00:25:59] I think and what I do

[00:26:01] is like

[00:26:02] first of all

[00:26:03] I want an equal relationship.

[00:26:05] I don't want to be the dominant

[00:26:07] domineering one.

[00:26:08] I mean that is a sin

[00:26:09] that you know

[00:26:10] if you're a biblical person

[00:26:11] Jezebel spirit

[00:26:12] they talk about that

[00:26:13] you know

[00:26:14] but I don't want those things

[00:26:16] like I want

[00:26:17] to be strong in my own

[00:26:19] self

[00:26:20] but when I come to him

[00:26:21] like I want to be vulnerable

[00:26:23] and that's the feminine

[00:26:24] part of me.

[00:26:25] I'm not a feminist

[00:26:26] but like I want to be feminine

[00:26:27] and vulnerable

[00:26:28] and I want him to take charge

[00:26:29] and

[00:26:30] and come for me

[00:26:31] and provide for me

[00:26:32] and be that

[00:26:32] and he is that

[00:26:33] you know

[00:26:34] so I think

[00:26:35] know each other

[00:26:36] like our personality types

[00:26:38] we know each other's personality types

[00:26:40] our love languages

[00:26:42] what

[00:26:43] you know the triggers are

[00:26:44] because

[00:26:45] when you know your partner

[00:26:47] so well

[00:26:48] you can

[00:26:50] be that

[00:26:51] support without being

[00:26:53] codependent on each other

[00:26:55] you know because I'll call him out

[00:26:56] on stuff

[00:26:57] like you know like hey

[00:26:59] you're

[00:26:59] going into this space

[00:27:01] or whatever

[00:27:01] like

[00:27:02] you have the power

[00:27:03] don't give your power away

[00:27:05] to you know such and such

[00:27:06] or whatever

[00:27:07] or he'll tell me like

[00:27:08] you know you're being quiet

[00:27:10] and you're not going after this

[00:27:11] why you know like

[00:27:12] so those are the things

[00:27:13] that like

[00:27:14] help

[00:27:15] and I think that's that intimate friendship

[00:27:17] you know where we can be totally vulnerable

[00:27:20] and intimate

[00:27:20] and I think that that goes

[00:27:22] as far as like friendship goes

[00:27:23] we do like we like to

[00:27:25] what

[00:27:26] we love like comedians

[00:27:27] and like sitcoms

[00:27:28] and laugh together

[00:27:29] like every night

[00:27:30] we try to sit down

[00:27:31] and like watch a sitcom

[00:27:32] or a comedian

[00:27:33] and

[00:27:34] and talk about the day

[00:27:35] and

[00:27:36] and just connect with each other

[00:27:39] like

[00:27:39] even if it's only 30 minutes

[00:27:41] or 45 minutes

[00:27:42] but it's like we usually try to laugh

[00:27:44] at something

[00:27:45] you know like a fun

[00:27:45] even like a funny meme

[00:27:46] or something like that

[00:27:47] and that's that's silly

[00:27:48] but that's what rejuvenates me

[00:27:51] I don't take a lot

[00:27:52] I really don't

[00:27:53] I don't need like

[00:27:54] hours of me time

[00:27:55] usually if I get a good workout

[00:27:57] and meditation in

[00:27:58] like I'm good to go

[00:28:00] but as far as him

[00:28:00] and I when we aren't connected

[00:28:02] it's when we haven't had that time

[00:28:04] when we haven't had that just

[00:28:07] for me it's dream

[00:28:08] what I call dream time

[00:28:09] where we just sit down

[00:28:10] and we're like

[00:28:10] okay,

[00:28:11] what are we envisioning in the next six months

[00:28:13] the next year

[00:28:14] the next

[00:28:14] you know ten years

[00:28:16] and being aligned in that

[00:28:18] because when we're not aligned in it

[00:28:20] it comes out

[00:28:21] like in everything

[00:28:22] like in our parenting

[00:28:24] and we'll bicker about like

[00:28:26] the stupidest things

[00:28:27] or you know

[00:28:28] like

[00:28:29] your boots are out

[00:28:30] and I tripped over him

[00:28:30] you know

[00:28:31] it's not that

[00:28:31] I'm really mad about your boots

[00:28:33] it's that

[00:28:34] we're not that

[00:28:35] so

[00:28:35] like to do those things

[00:28:36] I mean

[00:28:37] we really like to get away

[00:28:38] but that doesn't happen a lot

[00:28:41] but when we do

[00:28:42] we went to Puerto Rico last year

[00:28:44] for his 40th birthday

[00:28:45] and it was

[00:28:46] amazing

[00:28:47] it was what we needed

[00:28:49] which was a good thing

[00:28:50] because from April to November

[00:28:51] was a really hard season for us

[00:28:53] and that happened right before April

[00:28:55] so it was a good getaway

[00:28:57] to like refresh

[00:28:58] and be able to give our marriage

[00:29:00] what it needed to sustain

[00:29:01] the next nine months

[00:29:04] we really try to do those things

[00:29:06] date night

[00:29:07] once a month

[00:29:08] I'd like it to be more

[00:29:09] but with five kids

[00:29:10] and activities

[00:29:12] it's like

[00:29:13] we cut

[00:29:13] yeah

[00:29:14] our date night

[00:29:15] is just kind of that

[00:29:16] last hour of the night

[00:29:18] right

[00:29:19] where everybody's in bed

[00:29:20] and we can just kind of

[00:29:22] you know

[00:29:23] talk about things

[00:29:24] and then laugh

[00:29:25] and

[00:29:25] right

[00:29:26] yeah

[00:29:26] that

[00:29:27] and you know what

[00:29:27] still

[00:29:28] that's

[00:29:28] we do that

[00:29:30] the things you mentioned

[00:29:31] we share like

[00:29:33] funny memes

[00:29:34] with each other

[00:29:35] I'll send her a text

[00:29:36] during the day

[00:29:37] she'll send me things

[00:29:38] you know like

[00:29:39] take this little funny video out

[00:29:41] you know something like that

[00:29:42] because

[00:29:43] yeah little things like that

[00:29:44] really mean a lot

[00:29:45] especially to me

[00:29:46] because

[00:29:46] my love language is

[00:29:47] words of affirmation

[00:29:48] so any connection

[00:29:50] with like words

[00:29:51] whether it's a text

[00:29:52] even if it's a picture

[00:29:54] if he sees something

[00:29:55] that made him think of me

[00:29:56] you know like

[00:29:58] I know that he thinks of me

[00:30:00] in the day

[00:30:01] like it's not that I don't know it

[00:30:03] but it's really nice to be reminded of it

[00:30:05] especially with

[00:30:06] the hectic stuff of the day

[00:30:08] and like

[00:30:09] his love language is touch

[00:30:10] so I'll make sure like

[00:30:11] I'll give him you know

[00:30:13] touch his leg

[00:30:13] or his hand

[00:30:14] or his shoulder

[00:30:15] or like you know that

[00:30:16] and we both really value time

[00:30:18] so just making

[00:30:20] even that time

[00:30:21] like when we have that hour

[00:30:22] we're not on our phones

[00:30:24] we're not on the computer

[00:30:25] like if we're watching a show together

[00:30:27] we're watching a show together

[00:30:28] right

[00:30:29] it's very rare

[00:30:30] the only time would be like

[00:30:31] as if we're planning a vacation

[00:30:33] we have the laptop off

[00:30:34] and we're both looking at it

[00:30:35] you know

[00:30:35] but we

[00:30:36] we're not like

[00:30:38] there and separate

[00:30:39] which a lot of couples do

[00:30:40] you know they're like

[00:30:40] oh yeah we watch this

[00:30:41] but they're both on their laptop

[00:30:43] or on their phone

[00:30:44] and

[00:30:45] I always tell them

[00:30:45] I'm like put your phone away

[00:30:47] like engage with me

[00:30:48] I want you know

[00:30:49] even if it's

[00:30:50] even if we're watching TV

[00:30:52] we're still engaging

[00:30:53] we're laughing with each other

[00:30:54] we're saying stuff like

[00:30:54] oh my gosh I can't believe they did that

[00:30:56] and da da da

[00:30:56] you know and like we're connecting

[00:30:58] and it's a silly thing

[00:30:59] but like

[00:31:00] it's simple for us

[00:31:01] that we know we can get every day

[00:31:04] it fills us up

[00:31:05] and then we do try to plan

[00:31:06] like I said

[00:31:08] we like to go to concerts

[00:31:09] like in the summer

[00:31:10] outdoor concerts

[00:31:11] little things like that

[00:31:12] are just kind of fun

[00:31:13] and

[00:31:14] bring that kind of

[00:31:15] youthfulness back

[00:31:16] in our

[00:31:17] step because we like to

[00:31:19] listen to

[00:31:20] old 80s and 90s music

[00:31:22] and then stuff

[00:31:23] and

[00:31:24] you know

[00:31:24] in the summer we do more date nights

[00:31:26] because we'll go

[00:31:27] you know to the lake

[00:31:28] or we'll go drive around

[00:31:29] and

[00:31:30] check out the cornfields

[00:31:32] and

[00:31:35] we used to drive around

[00:31:37] and we'd watch neighborhoods

[00:31:39] get built

[00:31:40] and we

[00:31:40] you know plan our dream life

[00:31:42] and

[00:31:43] now we drive around

[00:31:44] and look at

[00:31:45] remember when that was this

[00:31:47] yeah

[00:31:48] yeah

[00:31:49] we're riding around in the older subdivisions

[00:31:51] like I remember when that house was built

[00:31:54] and now that looks like

[00:31:55] that would be a nice piece of rental property

[00:31:57] or you know

[00:31:58] so it's like

[00:31:59] you're still doing the same thing

[00:32:01] you're just like

[00:32:01] now you're in a different mindset

[00:32:03] so it's like

[00:32:04] yep

[00:32:04] before we were going to build a dream

[00:32:06] all right now we got a dream

[00:32:08] so let's see how we can multiply a dream

[00:32:10] Yep

[00:32:10] Yep

[00:32:11] for sure

[00:32:12] I've learned with

[00:32:13] with tab

[00:32:14] you know

[00:32:15] even if things aren't going

[00:32:17] right

[00:32:17] or the way we're

[00:32:18] we're wanting them to go

[00:32:20] if we can at least just sit down

[00:32:22] and just

[00:32:22] continue to

[00:32:23] to talk about how

[00:32:25] things are going to change

[00:32:26] how

[00:32:27] you know

[00:32:27] continue the dream

[00:32:29] you know

[00:32:29] sit down and talk about it

[00:32:31] then that

[00:32:32] that makes all the difference in the world

[00:32:34] right

[00:32:34] exactly

[00:32:36] he's reluctant sometimes

[00:32:37] yeah

[00:32:38] to do that

[00:32:38] you know

[00:32:40] you guys talk about text messages

[00:32:42] back and forth

[00:32:42] and

[00:32:43] you know

[00:32:43] I'll get a text

[00:32:45] from tab

[00:32:45] that's about that long enough

[00:32:48] it gets

[00:32:49] okay

[00:32:49] yep

[00:32:50] or two

[00:32:50] okay

[00:32:51] okay

[00:32:52] okay

[00:32:53] okay

[00:32:53] yep

[00:32:54] yep

[00:32:55] I love that reply

[00:32:56] okay

[00:32:56] thumbs up

[00:32:57] it's like

[00:32:58] you don't understand

[00:32:59] like

[00:32:59] you sent me this long text

[00:33:01] right now

[00:33:02] I got to figure out how to fit this screw

[00:33:04] right

[00:33:04] yep

[00:33:05] I know

[00:33:05] and you got to tighten up

[00:33:07] so

[00:33:07] yeah

[00:33:08] yep

[00:33:08] and you got to tighten up

[00:33:09] and I don't have time to

[00:33:10] take a bite of pieces right now

[00:33:12] and I know that

[00:33:13] like when I send him a text

[00:33:15] I know it

[00:33:16] you know

[00:33:16] I don't get offended

[00:33:17] that's another thing

[00:33:19] you know early on in our marriage

[00:33:20] I would get offended

[00:33:21] you know

[00:33:22] they talked about the spirit of offense

[00:33:23] and

[00:33:24] the devil knew that

[00:33:25] that would just bother me

[00:33:26] because of war

[00:33:27] and so like

[00:33:28] he's very quiet

[00:33:29] and so it's like

[00:33:30] why do you do this

[00:33:30] why do you do it

[00:33:31] and I think that's what a lot of young couples

[00:33:33] like

[00:33:33] if you're listening

[00:33:34] and you're a young couple on here

[00:33:36] just know

[00:33:37] if you have a healthy relationship

[00:33:38] and you truly believe that your partner loves you

[00:33:40] then

[00:33:41] don't take everything they have

[00:33:44] as offense

[00:33:44] because you don't know what they're going for

[00:33:46] in that moment

[00:33:47] and that's something that I have to tell myself a lot

[00:33:49] but I also have to tell him

[00:33:51] you can stop

[00:33:52] and take the time

[00:33:53] of 30 seconds

[00:33:55] you know

[00:33:56] and just take a breath

[00:33:57] and maybe that's what God wanted you to do

[00:33:59] is to realign for a second

[00:34:02] do that

[00:34:02] and then move on

[00:34:03] so it goes both ways

[00:34:05] and we both learned in that

[00:34:06] especially when I want to like

[00:34:08] really talk about

[00:34:09] things

[00:34:10] I'm like

[00:34:11] I'm open to however

[00:34:12] we want to talk about this

[00:34:13] but we can't keep pushing it under the rug

[00:34:16] like I don't want a yelling match

[00:34:18] I don't want

[00:34:19] I'm right you're right

[00:34:20] let's put it all out on the table

[00:34:22] but we can't

[00:34:24] continue

[00:34:25] doing this

[00:34:26] if we see a vision for our future

[00:34:29] and

[00:34:30] as a wife

[00:34:30] I don't ever want to like

[00:34:31] call him out

[00:34:32] you know because I'm

[00:34:34] again a very strong personality

[00:34:36] but there are things that come up

[00:34:37] that it's like

[00:34:38] but we have to address this

[00:34:39] like we can't

[00:34:41] just

[00:34:42] keep this dynamic of

[00:34:44] you know

[00:34:44] because he has his dynamic

[00:34:46] with his family in the farm

[00:34:47] he has his dynamic

[00:34:48] as a real estate mogul

[00:34:50] and he has his dynamic

[00:34:51] as my husband

[00:34:52] and

[00:34:53] coming into those roles

[00:34:54] and learning those roles

[00:34:56] you know sometimes they overlap

[00:34:57] and sometimes they don't

[00:34:58] you know and so it's like

[00:34:59] we have to sit down

[00:35:00] and be like

[00:35:01] okay

[00:35:02] what do we want to see moving forward

[00:35:04] and when we can just

[00:35:05] get it out

[00:35:06] and talk about it

[00:35:08] whether anything has really changed or not

[00:35:09] it always alleviates the stress

[00:35:12] right

[00:35:13] so it's like for couples when they say like

[00:35:15] communication is key

[00:35:16] you know that's a big term whatever

[00:35:18] you don't have to over analyze it

[00:35:19] but like you do have to get it out

[00:35:21] in a way that allows

[00:35:24] it to be neutral

[00:35:25] and there are sometimes when you say stuff

[00:35:28] and you just have to take it as neutral

[00:35:30] it's not a judgment

[00:35:31] it's not

[00:35:32] good, bad or ugly

[00:35:33] it's like these are the facts

[00:35:35] and if we want them to change

[00:35:38] some things have to change

[00:35:39] it doesn't mean you're a bad human

[00:35:41] it doesn't mean I'm a bad human

[00:35:42] it just means that like things

[00:35:43] that we want

[00:35:45] something has to change

[00:35:46] and so we're going to have to do the work

[00:35:49] which is hard

[00:35:50] you know because we always

[00:35:51] you know we don't always want to do the work

[00:35:53] to do that but

[00:35:54] again I'm not afraid of hard work

[00:35:56] so I'll do the work

[00:35:56] but a lot of people don't want to do the emotional work

[00:35:58] and then that's where they get stuck in their ways

[00:36:00] and

[00:36:01] I think that is the one

[00:36:02] benefit to us is like

[00:36:04] I'm like bring on the challenge

[00:36:06] you know bring on the emotional challenge

[00:36:08] because at the end of the day

[00:36:10] it's the mental and emotional challenge

[00:36:12] that will make or break a marriage

[00:36:13] will make or break a business

[00:36:14] will make or break a relationship

[00:36:16] between a parent

[00:36:17] and a child

[00:36:19] and it's because we're all self-centered

[00:36:21] and we like ego

[00:36:22] and we're not willing to look at ourselves

[00:36:24] and say you know what

[00:36:25] I was wrong

[00:36:27] I attributed to the escalation of the fight

[00:36:30] even if they did it

[00:36:31] like even if that person did it

[00:36:32] it's like own your own place

[00:36:34] and then together in a healthy relationship

[00:36:37] like move forward from it

[00:36:38] Right, right

[00:36:39] and that's one of the things like

[00:36:41] we were talking about

[00:36:42] you know the different personalities

[00:36:45] while you're talking I was thinking about

[00:36:47] this scale my mom had on the dining room

[00:36:49] or the living room table

[00:36:51] and it was just like the latest justice scale

[00:36:53] she had the little bounce of thing

[00:36:56] and I would play with it as a child

[00:36:57] you know put different things on this side

[00:36:59] put something else

[00:37:00] move a little bit you know

[00:37:01] Did she know you were playing with it?

[00:37:03] She probably did

[00:37:05] and she knew I had my behind the lid

[00:37:08] You know

[00:37:09] and that kind of helped me

[00:37:11] understand what it's all about

[00:37:14] is balance, you know

[00:37:15] it's like you take one personality

[00:37:17] you take two different personalities

[00:37:19] because I mean if you both were alike

[00:37:21] you probably would

[00:37:23] not that you wouldn't be able to get anything accomplished

[00:37:25] but it'll be harder to get things accomplished

[00:37:28] you like to talk and I like to talk

[00:37:29] we just

[00:37:30] we're just gonna go back go at each other

[00:37:32] but somebody has to be you know

[00:37:33] you have to have that balance

[00:37:34] you know what I'm saying

[00:37:35] that balance yeah

[00:37:36] learning that life is all about

[00:37:38] just creating a balance

[00:37:39] yes, I'm mad about this

[00:37:41] I get excited about this

[00:37:42] she doesn't get excited about this

[00:37:44] so how do we meet in the middle?

[00:37:46] Right

[00:37:47] You know where we stand on this issue

[00:37:50] we're not going to agree on every single thing

[00:37:52] every single time

[00:37:54] but just know that regardless of anything

[00:37:56] both you guys

[00:37:57] have your best interests at heart

[00:38:00] that's what it is

[00:38:00] right, right

[00:38:02] sometimes that all you have is

[00:38:04] that we want it to work.

[00:38:06] Yeah, right

[00:38:07] and that's what we always go back to

[00:38:09] I always tell them that

[00:38:10] I'm like and I almost

[00:38:12] I'm gonna tell a story about yesterday

[00:38:14] so our kids have been sick

[00:38:15] okay, so we're like stomach vomit

[00:38:18] diarrhea all that fun stuff

[00:38:19] and then we had this infestation of mice

[00:38:22] like we have had mice in 12 years

[00:38:23] that we've lived in this house

[00:38:24] it's like this horrible infestation

[00:38:26] so we have like this mouse poop

[00:38:27] and we have this diarrhea and this throw up

[00:38:29] and all this stuff, you know

[00:38:30] and we're doing laundry

[00:38:32] and we're cleaning, lice all

[00:38:33] all this stuff and all this craziness

[00:38:34] and I never did sit in the taxi

[00:38:37] but I was gonna be like

[00:38:39] throw all the poop that

[00:38:41] going on right now

[00:38:43] at the end of the day

[00:38:43] I'm just glad I'm doing this with you

[00:38:45] you know, it's like

[00:38:46] and we have some financial stuff

[00:38:48] and all that other extra added stress

[00:38:50] you know

[00:38:51] but this is where we do kind of have to learn

[00:38:53] to laugh at it

[00:38:53] because I know it's gonna change

[00:38:55] like I know my God is good

[00:38:57] and there are blessings

[00:38:58] and money didn't go away

[00:38:59] and we're gonna figure it out

[00:39:00] and I know for him it's harder

[00:39:03] because that's not how he's wired

[00:39:04] and that's okay

[00:39:05] I'm in his life to bring that to him

[00:39:08] but I can't be mad

[00:39:09] that he's not like

[00:39:11] I can't be like

[00:39:11] well why are you worried about that?

[00:39:12] It's all gonna work out

[00:39:13] like I can't get upset about that

[00:39:15] and he has a different level

[00:39:16] because he's a man

[00:39:17] and his like providing is different

[00:39:19] his personality is different

[00:39:21] things that worry him, you know

[00:39:22] but it's like we do learn to like

[00:39:24] kind of laugh in that

[00:39:25] and then I also have to

[00:39:26] I can't be so out there

[00:39:28] but like oh it's gonna happen

[00:39:29] like I have to say

[00:39:31] what's gonna change it

[00:39:32] show me the way

[00:39:33] and do the work

[00:39:34] do that

[00:39:34] so it is

[00:39:36] it's the balance

[00:39:37] and understanding

[00:39:39] and I think that's the biggest thing

[00:39:41] is when you can really understand your spouse

[00:39:43] and knowing their personality

[00:39:45] and knowing

[00:39:47] the things that really get him excited

[00:39:49] but also alleviate stress

[00:39:51] and so there are things

[00:39:52] that I can talk with him about

[00:39:54] that alleviate stress

[00:39:55] he knows things he can say to me

[00:39:56] that like lights me up

[00:39:57] and gets me energized

[00:39:58] if I get, you know

[00:40:00] feeling defeated or whatever

[00:40:02] because it's in my best interest

[00:40:04] for him to be his best self

[00:40:06] right

[00:40:07] and I think in marriages

[00:40:10] we get so much like

[00:40:11] but they're not taking care of mine

[00:40:13] you know, I'm not getting appreciated

[00:40:14] it's not

[00:40:15] but when I appreciate him

[00:40:17] and he's taken care of

[00:40:18] and he feels his best self

[00:40:20] do you think he's gonna

[00:40:22] like emulate that to me?

[00:40:24] Absolutely

[00:40:25] absolutely

[00:40:26] when he feels like crap

[00:40:28] and I demasculate him

[00:40:29] and I make him feel like crap

[00:40:31] he's not gonna want to make my life easier

[00:40:33] at all

[00:40:34] right

[00:40:34] you know

[00:40:35] and so

[00:40:36] you know, and vice versa

[00:40:37] when I'm feeling energized in this

[00:40:39] like he knows I'm gonna

[00:40:41] go above and beyond

[00:40:42] and it's just

[00:40:43] it's the law of reciprocity

[00:40:45] and it's when you truly love somebody

[00:40:47] that's what you want for them

[00:40:48] and seeing that

[00:40:50] it's definitely not always easy

[00:40:52] and then

[00:40:53] it doesn't always happen

[00:40:54] but like

[00:40:55] at the end of the day

[00:40:56] we always say it's like

[00:40:57] what's most important?

[00:40:59] right

[00:40:59] us

[00:41:00] and then our children

[00:41:01] so it's like

[00:41:03] us

[00:41:03] and our kids

[00:41:04] so

[00:41:06] exactly

[00:41:07] and then

[00:41:07] it comes to a point where it's like

[00:41:09] with

[00:41:10] a lot of couples

[00:41:11] it's like

[00:41:12] they're fighting against each other

[00:41:14] instead of trying to learn how to work together

[00:41:16] yeah

[00:41:18] you're frustrated over here

[00:41:19] I'm frustrated over here

[00:41:21] we have these issues going on

[00:41:22] but I'm gonna go over here and do my thing

[00:41:24] and I'm gonna go over here and do my thing

[00:41:25] and we're not going to discuss it

[00:41:26] we'll just keep

[00:41:28] pushing the can down the road until

[00:41:30] bam it's an explosion

[00:41:32] and now you have this

[00:41:33] like I'm gonna do this at a spite of you

[00:41:35] and that's what my sister's marriage was

[00:41:37] like he would buy an expensive fishing pole

[00:41:40] then she would go buy expensive shoes

[00:41:42] and then he'd go buy this

[00:41:43] and then they'd have no money

[00:41:44] and their credit would be

[00:41:45] right

[00:41:45] yeah

[00:41:46] right

[00:41:46] it's affecting both of you

[00:41:47] and then Carly you would be like

[00:41:49] you got $20 like a bar

[00:41:50] oh yeah

[00:41:52] and I'm like no

[00:41:53] I don't

[00:41:53] I'm just

[00:41:55] yeah

[00:41:56] friends with someone

[00:41:58] and she would get in these

[00:42:00] like rage fits and get angry about things

[00:42:02] and I watched her one day

[00:42:03] she's angry

[00:42:04] and she took her phone

[00:42:05] and threw it across the room

[00:42:07] and I'm like

[00:42:09] well now you're gonna be even more upset

[00:42:11] because

[00:42:11] you're gonna have to replace that

[00:42:14] that did help the situation

[00:42:16] it made things worse

[00:42:18] now you have two problems

[00:42:19] instead of one

[00:42:20] one of the things that her dad said

[00:42:22] to her that is profound

[00:42:25] he said you know what

[00:42:26] being angry

[00:42:27] or being mad

[00:42:29] is like pissing on yourself

[00:42:32] you are the only one that will feel it

[00:42:33] yeah

[00:42:34] you're the only one

[00:42:35] yes

[00:42:35] yes

[00:42:36] so often times the other thing that you realize

[00:42:40] how angry you are

[00:42:41] and that goes into like

[00:42:43] okay, so a big thing that I

[00:42:45] when I get interviewed people ask me like

[00:42:47] what what's something you can tell entrepreneurs

[00:42:49] or people like

[00:42:51] you know to make

[00:42:52] like what's the one word of wisdom or whatever

[00:42:55] like you can say it in one word

[00:42:56] but they always ask me that question, you know

[00:42:58] and I always try to do something a little different

[00:43:01] you know people are is like, you know work hard

[00:43:02] or do this and I say

[00:43:04] the number one thing that you can really do

[00:43:06] to advance yourself in your marriage

[00:43:08] in your entrepreneurship

[00:43:09] in your parenthood

[00:43:10] It does not matter

[00:43:11] is forgiveness

[00:43:13] and it's forgiveness of not only your spouse

[00:43:17] but forgiveness of yourself

[00:43:18] yes

[00:43:19] like you're gonna do things wrong

[00:43:21] you're gonna overreact

[00:43:22] especially in a marriage

[00:43:23] because there's so much

[00:43:25] I mean if you're passionately in love with your

[00:43:27] spouse, which I hope you are

[00:43:29] with that the fire right

[00:43:31] the flame they talk about like the flame

[00:43:32] you're gonna get burned a little bit.

[00:43:34] So you're gonna do things wrong

[00:43:36] especially in the beginning

[00:43:37] and especially when you start having kids

[00:43:39] like you do a lot of things wrong

[00:43:41] and if you hold on to unforgiveness

[00:43:43] if you hold on to guilt and shame

[00:43:45] it will manifest as anger

[00:43:46] it will manifest as frustration

[00:43:48] it will manifest

[00:43:49] and it will also cause disease in your body

[00:43:52] and things will start happening

[00:43:53] and then you start cruddy

[00:43:55] and then when you feel it's shipping cruddy

[00:43:56] and you know, it's just the whole thing

[00:43:58] when you can learn to forgive yourself

[00:44:01] for the things that you do wrong

[00:44:03] and then just say like

[00:44:04] how can I make this better?

[00:44:05] You know, just ask the simple question

[00:44:07] or like for him if he did something

[00:44:10] whatever

[00:44:10] whether it was behavioral financial

[00:44:12] with the kids with me

[00:44:14] whatever indirect direct

[00:44:16] It doesn't matter

[00:44:17] if I sit down and be like

[00:44:18] I forgive you

[00:44:19] because if I'm holding on to that

[00:44:21] when you talked about the pissing on yourself

[00:44:22] which is so funny

[00:44:24] they talk about forgiveness

[00:44:25] like unforgiveness is like drinking the poison

[00:44:28] and expecting the other person to die

[00:44:30] right

[00:44:31] they don't

[00:44:33] but people think if I forgive

[00:44:35] then that's letting them off the hook

[00:44:37] when I forgive him

[00:44:39] it doesn't mean hey go do it again

[00:44:40] it means how can we change this

[00:44:42] so it doesn't happen again

[00:44:44] if it's in myself

[00:44:46] especially I do this like with parenting

[00:44:48] if I lose my cool

[00:44:49] I'm like

[00:44:50] I forgive myself

[00:44:51] how can I make it

[00:44:52] so if that comes up again

[00:44:54] I can react differently

[00:44:55] respond differently

[00:44:57] do I need to take some more time for myself

[00:44:59] was I not getting enough rest

[00:45:00] did I you know what

[00:45:02] I played over my head

[00:45:03] how can I change it

[00:45:05] make a little shift

[00:45:06] even if it's a little bit better the next time

[00:45:09] and so I really do think

[00:45:11] forgiveness

[00:45:12] over all is something that is undervalued

[00:45:15] and under talked about

[00:45:17] because people are like well, I don't want to make

[00:45:19] I'm not making anybody

[00:45:20] but if you want to live a blessed life

[00:45:23] if you want to have a blessed marriage

[00:45:26] you have to forgive

[00:45:28] and it's hard.

[00:45:29] I mean it is hard

[00:45:30] especially people have wronged you

[00:45:31] like when you were younger

[00:45:33] especially when they're talking about trauma

[00:45:35] and I'm not saying it's easy

[00:45:36] you need to really go with a professional

[00:45:38] there's different programs

[00:45:40] there's therapist coaching different things for that kind

[00:45:43] but you really do have to heal in that

[00:45:45] and forgive if you want

[00:45:47] a blessed marriage

[00:45:48] and we've seen it

[00:45:50] I've seen it over and over

[00:45:51] I'll look at a marriage

[00:45:52] I'll do something

[00:45:53] and I'm like if you could just forgive somebody

[00:45:57] right

[00:45:57] yeah, you can forgive them

[00:46:00] and truly of your heart

[00:46:01] and move forward

[00:46:03] you're not taking that toxic

[00:46:04] that energy all that

[00:46:06] that's suck literally sucking the life out of you

[00:46:08] and your marriage

[00:46:10] if you look at divorce rates

[00:46:12] it's there's it's always the unforgiveness

[00:46:14] right, right

[00:46:16] and people aren't as like

[00:46:19] listening to some of the younger generation

[00:46:21] on social media and online

[00:46:23] and it's like you guys don't give anything

[00:46:26] you know

[00:46:28] nobody

[00:46:29] one thing I've learned that

[00:46:30] nobody is professional at anything

[00:46:33] people have experience

[00:46:35] they have years of experience

[00:46:36] but we're all trying to figure things out for ourselves

[00:46:39] so it's like, you know

[00:46:41] sometimes you may have to you

[00:46:43] Yeah, when you was a teenager

[00:46:45] at 13

[00:46:47] a guy cheats on me

[00:46:48] that's it I'm done with

[00:46:50] that is that that is a standard statement

[00:46:53] I agree with that

[00:46:54] but when you're 32

[00:46:56] you have to look okay

[00:46:56] now I got a kid now

[00:46:58] you know

[00:46:59] I have to may have to allow that mistake to happen

[00:47:02] let him understand that

[00:47:04] this really hurt me

[00:47:06] Yep

[00:47:06] maybe he could say

[00:47:07] you know what

[00:47:08] I never want her to feel like that again

[00:47:10] right

[00:47:11] and you have to get to the real problem

[00:47:12] like if you

[00:47:14] like I mean there's

[00:47:16] okay, there there's so many different scenarios with

[00:47:18] with forgiveness

[00:47:19] but let's just take it in a marriage

[00:47:22] if he wrongs me or if he does something

[00:47:25] and it needs to change

[00:47:26] like it needs to change

[00:47:27] like I can forgive him

[00:47:28] but the behavior needs to change

[00:47:30] we need to talk about

[00:47:32] why that's happening

[00:47:34] right

[00:47:34] like if there's something that I am reacting responding

[00:47:37] to we need to figure out the root cause of that

[00:47:40] and again, it's not that it's hard

[00:47:43] in a way

[00:47:44] but it's that emotional work that sometimes people are

[00:47:46] like I don't want to go there

[00:47:48] and it's like

[00:47:50] like for us the dynamic like his dad has a very dominant

[00:47:53] personality

[00:47:54] so then his whole life.

[00:47:56] What do you think that was

[00:47:57] you know, like his dad was dominant

[00:47:59] he was passive

[00:48:01] so guess what that was like

[00:48:02] why do you think I don't want to be a dominant human

[00:48:05] because he's gonna have

[00:48:07] issues from like when he was a child

[00:48:10] and that's work that I can't do for him.

[00:48:13] I can't make him do the work of you know, emotionally

[00:48:17] forgiving and doing those things

[00:48:18] and he's done that

[00:48:19] and I've done that

[00:48:21] in my own life with my sister who was an addict

[00:48:25] it's not fun

[00:48:26] but it's so rewarding because it's so freeing

[00:48:30] and then forgiveness does actually become easy

[00:48:33] when you can do the hard work at first of like

[00:48:35] forgiving somebody that was like

[00:48:37] you know, like you said someone cheated on you

[00:48:39] like I'm never gonna you know, forgive them and da da da da

[00:48:42] and they wronged me

[00:48:43] if you can actually go back and do the work

[00:48:46] and forgive that the hardest part

[00:48:48] then it's easy to forgive

[00:48:50] and it's really about perception.

[00:48:52] It's about putting yourself in that person

[00:48:54] even if someone cuts you off in traffic.

[00:48:55] It's like you don't know what they're going through

[00:48:58] if he does something to me

[00:49:00] I don't know what he was going through that day fully

[00:49:02] you know, and we talk about it

[00:49:04] and how we can change that behavior

[00:49:06] so that it doesn't happen again

[00:49:08] and just knowing that if it does

[00:49:10] I will still give you grace.

[00:49:11] I will still forgive

[00:49:12] it's not like I only forgive you once for that

[00:49:14] it's I love the saying like

[00:49:16] hate the sin love the sinner

[00:49:18] right, right

[00:49:19] because that truly changed my life

[00:49:21] with my relationship with my sister who was an addict

[00:49:24] because I didn't hate her

[00:49:25] I loved her and that was the problem

[00:49:27] it was like I loved her so much

[00:49:29] and I love him so much

[00:49:31] and we love them so much that that's that passion

[00:49:34] and so when they wrong us

[00:49:36] it cuts to the core because we're so vulnerable with them

[00:49:40] and realizing that's okay.

[00:49:43] We just have to look at how we can change that again

[00:49:47] and that forgiveness isn't just a one-time thing

[00:49:49] and in the Bible, it's like

[00:49:51] 7 times 77 or you know,

[00:49:53] whatever like I will forgive you

[00:49:55] which means really inevitable

[00:49:57] like I will forgive you no matter what

[00:49:58] but we're going to change something

[00:50:00] so that we have a healthy relationship

[00:50:02] you can't allow it be a doormat

[00:50:04] you know, you can't allow those things to happen

[00:50:06] but you can say let's how can we change those

[00:50:09] so that they're different and more beneficial for our marriage

[00:50:12] and that's that when you have both partners willing to

[00:50:17] put that work in and make that commitment

[00:50:21] is what is needed.

[00:50:22] And it's a journey

[00:50:24] and you will come to it again and again in different forms.

[00:50:28] We talked early into the podcast about a pot of chili

[00:50:32] that almost broke us up

[00:50:38] and he threw out my chili and would not apologize

[00:50:41] but like you said, there was a root issue going on

[00:50:44] that we finally had to get to

[00:50:46] and that not being intentional with connecting

[00:50:51] and just kind of we started living separate lives

[00:50:55] and we were just kind of like characters in

[00:51:00] separate stories.

[00:51:01] So how do we get back to being in the same story?

[00:51:08] So you've talked about the children

[00:51:11] which on good days, that's a lot to have five children

[00:51:15] but you said they're sick right now

[00:51:17] you have all these things going on

[00:51:19] you're in a season that's not favorable right now.

[00:51:23] So what is it that makes it easy to get up and keep going?

[00:51:30] What is it that makes you say, you know what?

[00:51:33] I'm done.

[00:51:34] I'm not doing it today.

[00:51:35] How do you keep the connection going even when you just

[00:51:40] want to look at each other and say, you know what?

[00:51:42] That's it.

[00:51:44] I can't see any more poop.

[00:51:45] I'm done.

[00:51:49] I think the key word is season, you know this

[00:51:52] whole grand scheme of things.

[00:51:54] This is just a short period of time where

[00:51:58] you know things, we're not sleeping or you know,

[00:52:02] we're up to our elbows and poop or whatever.

[00:52:06] Right.

[00:52:07] I love that.

[00:52:08] I love that.

[00:52:09] It's a short period of time and you know, eventually

[00:52:13] they're going to be, you know, 26 years old

[00:52:15] and you're going to be wishing they were.

[00:52:19] You'd be wanting to change some diapers.

[00:52:20] Right.

[00:52:21] I know right?

[00:52:22] My gosh.

[00:52:22] Yeah, it is.

[00:52:23] It's like ours and stuff.

[00:52:25] Come on.

[00:52:27] Yeah, we have two dogs.

[00:52:28] So that's a whole nother thing.

[00:52:30] But so I mean it is it's perception and you know

[00:52:33] what?

[00:52:33] It's like when you look at it and I always think

[00:52:36] like it could just be so much worse.

[00:52:38] I mean like we have a friend of ours and her

[00:52:40] daughter is the same age as our fourth daughter

[00:52:44] and she passed away like unexpectedly in the night.

[00:52:47] She had like a respiratory infection and passed away.

[00:52:50] And so it's like when you look at those things,

[00:52:52] I'm like, yes.

[00:52:54] Is it fun to have your kids have the stomach flu

[00:52:56] or you know, a cold or a cough or whatever,

[00:52:58] but I'm like they're here, you know, in those

[00:53:00] moments of exhaustion.

[00:53:01] I'm like, okay, but I have a friend who is

[00:53:04] up all night because their you know, son was

[00:53:06] autistic or you know, and so it's really

[00:53:09] like looking at that perception and that God

[00:53:11] gave us in a lot amount of time.

[00:53:13] I don't know how much time that is, but I

[00:53:15] know he gave us gifts and he gave us so

[00:53:17] many blessings along the way.

[00:53:19] And yeah, there are moments of like frustration

[00:53:22] and why is this so hard and why you know,

[00:53:25] and you can always play that game but living

[00:53:28] in our gifts like really doing I will say

[00:53:32] recently like being able to be a mom and

[00:53:34] like really give my gifting of of training

[00:53:38] and speaking like that energizes me so that

[00:53:40] I'm a better wife and a better mom and even

[00:53:42] my daughter noticed that she's like mom when

[00:53:44] you can go work at the office for even like

[00:53:46] even if it's a couple hours.

[00:53:47] She's like you're so much happier and it's

[00:53:51] because I feel that fulfillment and that I

[00:53:53] can be the best mom, you know it in my body

[00:53:57] and spirit even if I'm not 100% even if

[00:53:59] there are off days, even if the finances

[00:54:01] don't look good.

[00:54:02] It's like again, I go to the whole like

[00:54:04] God is good and he we live in America

[00:54:06] and there's so many opportunities and

[00:54:08] money didn't go away and money is not a

[00:54:10] master and it's just a tool and we just

[00:54:12] need to find more of it and there's

[00:54:14] we're so blessed to have those opportunities

[00:54:17] and again, it's expanding our mind and

[00:54:19] saying what do we need to do next and

[00:54:22] and just doing that next best step and

[00:54:24] that whatever has been given us whatever

[00:54:27] challenge is building our character, right?

[00:54:31] Or what God is going to give us in

[00:54:32] the future because I know it's great.

[00:54:35] I just I know I told you guys at

[00:54:37] the beginning of this.

[00:54:37] I knew I was going to marry this guy

[00:54:39] when I was 15 like I knew there was

[00:54:41] an intuition.

[00:54:42] I know that we're going to have seven

[00:54:44] figure business eight-figure business.

[00:54:47] I won't be able to withstand that

[00:54:49] and be the mom I want and the

[00:54:51] and the wife I want to be if I

[00:54:53] didn't go through these things to

[00:54:54] build up the character that I need

[00:54:56] to be the leader of a company like

[00:54:58] that like there's no way like 10

[00:55:01] years ago.

[00:55:01] Are you kidding me?

[00:55:02] I didn't even know how to do any

[00:55:04] sort of sales or marketing online

[00:55:05] like, you know, I didn't even know

[00:55:07] what it meant to be a true leader

[00:55:08] or to employ somebody I was scared

[00:55:10] to employ somebody because of employment

[00:55:11] tax like I didn't want to have

[00:55:13] employees for that reason, you know,

[00:55:15] and now it's like I've been

[00:55:17] broadened to be able to withstand

[00:55:19] that because God does not want to

[00:55:21] give you something that's going to

[00:55:22] make you crumble and he won't do

[00:55:23] it.

[00:55:23] You can force it and you will

[00:55:25] crumble and so for me, like

[00:55:28] you said, it's a season.

[00:55:29] It's character building and it's

[00:55:31] hard and when you're in it,

[00:55:33] you don't necessarily want it,

[00:55:34] but I've learned to look at it

[00:55:36] that way.

[00:55:36] So I'm like, I know something

[00:55:38] great is happening like I know

[00:55:39] it's coming because of it.

[00:55:41] So secretly that like makes me

[00:55:43] smile.

[00:55:44] Somebody said a statement about

[00:55:45] like their kids they didn't want

[00:55:47] their kids to ever go through

[00:55:50] hard times or they just wanted

[00:55:51] their kids to be happy and I'm

[00:55:53] sitting here like how can I make

[00:55:55] my kids like stumble in the

[00:55:57] morning so they have to you

[00:55:58] know, like their alarm off

[00:56:00] so they're like how I can

[00:56:01] shoot them up a little bit.

[00:56:02] Right?

[00:56:03] I mean like it's like a lot

[00:56:05] of her.

[00:56:05] Yeah, he takes him out and

[00:56:07] makes him lay pipe like we

[00:56:08] have daughters and he goes in

[00:56:09] you know, and not that I think

[00:56:11] you have to do the labor

[00:56:12] intensive but you have to

[00:56:13] understand like you have to

[00:56:15] know.

[00:56:15] I think all CEOs need to clean

[00:56:17] the toilets.

[00:56:18] Absolutely.

[00:56:18] You know the building, you

[00:56:19] know, they need to know that

[00:56:20] I'm not again.

[00:56:21] I'm the whole like work smart

[00:56:23] or not harder, but you still

[00:56:24] need to know what that means

[00:56:26] and that feeling and that's

[00:56:29] why I want to take our kids

[00:56:30] on mission work because it's

[00:56:31] like I want you to truly

[00:56:32] understand what it means to

[00:56:33] have running water right?

[00:56:35] Like you'll only drink bottled

[00:56:37] water.

[00:56:38] Our water is great from the

[00:56:39] tap like go to a country that

[00:56:41] doesn't have it.

[00:56:41] You know what I'm saying?

[00:56:42] So it's like, yeah, it's like

[00:56:44] it's good to have those like

[00:56:46] expectations and take care of

[00:56:47] your body and all those

[00:56:48] things that have nice things.

[00:56:49] I have no problem with that

[00:56:50] have that but like know what

[00:56:52] you're comparing it to right

[00:56:54] and being humble in it.

[00:56:56] Are you being like a snob

[00:56:57] like I'm better than that,

[00:56:59] you know, so all of that is

[00:57:00] perspective and insight and

[00:57:02] again, we're in a hard season

[00:57:04] right now, but at the same

[00:57:05] time, I'm literally smiling

[00:57:07] and it's not fake right?

[00:57:09] I have this man.

[00:57:10] I love him.

[00:57:10] This is so fun for me to do

[00:57:12] this with him because I do

[00:57:12] podcasts all the time by myself

[00:57:15] and so this is fun for me.

[00:57:16] I'm like, this is like,

[00:57:17] you know, this is her dream.

[00:57:18] This is date night.

[00:57:20] I'm glad you could be a part

[00:57:21] of that.

[00:57:22] Yeah, right.

[00:57:22] I know right?

[00:57:24] And our kids are safe.

[00:57:25] They're with you know,

[00:57:26] and they're together and

[00:57:27] I'm sure they're fighting

[00:57:28] right now and they're dealing

[00:57:29] with it whatever.

[00:57:31] Super whatever too, but

[00:57:34] we're together and I don't

[00:57:36] know as simplistic as that

[00:57:38] sounds. It's like as long

[00:57:40] as we have a vision and

[00:57:42] I really truly believe

[00:57:43] without vision you'll perish.

[00:57:44] So like our vision for our

[00:57:45] life is always evolving

[00:57:48] and being connected to

[00:57:50] each other and our family

[00:57:51] is that's just really

[00:57:53] all I you know, we need

[00:57:54] because I know it's going

[00:57:55] to have like the finances

[00:57:56] are going to come.

[00:57:57] That's like when it

[00:57:58] finally comes people are

[00:57:59] going to be like, oh did

[00:58:00] you ever? Yeah, I did.

[00:58:01] It's done.

[00:58:03] It's just a matter of who

[00:58:04] I need to become to be

[00:58:06] able to handle that and

[00:58:07] develop that and move

[00:58:08] forward in that and

[00:58:10] and still be strong marriage.

[00:58:12] I've heard it said it's

[00:58:13] like fine-tuning your

[00:58:14] magnet because you attract

[00:58:16] everything that you want

[00:58:18] is a desire but you

[00:58:19] just have to fine-tune

[00:58:20] your magnet, point your

[00:58:22] magnet in the right

[00:58:23] direction and say, okay,

[00:58:25] it's coming now and

[00:58:26] everything is coming,

[00:58:27] you know, but the thing

[00:58:29] is I had a thought

[00:58:31] before I said that and

[00:58:33] I don't know what it was.

[00:58:35] Welcome to 48.

[00:58:37] Right.

[00:58:38] Ten years from now,

[00:58:39] you'll understand.

[00:58:41] Yes.

[00:58:42] I know what I want to

[00:58:42] say, but I don't know

[00:58:43] y'all.

[00:58:44] I think y'all might have

[00:58:45] paced us with five cases.

[00:58:48] We have four but

[00:58:50] I can only recall a

[00:58:52] short period of time

[00:58:53] where we had them all

[00:58:54] at home.

[00:58:55] Sure.

[00:58:56] Bless you.

[00:58:59] I mean it's challenging.

[00:59:00] I'm not going to sit here

[00:59:01] and say that it's not

[00:59:02] I mean it's a daily

[00:59:03] challenge for sure

[00:59:05] and you can just

[00:59:07] want to throw on the towel

[00:59:08] and there are some days

[00:59:09] in the morning.

[00:59:09] I just like sit on the

[00:59:10] couch and I'm just

[00:59:12] okay, you know,

[00:59:13] and then there's something

[00:59:14] that is like I'm ready to go.

[00:59:15] Sometimes you got to sit down

[00:59:17] with all that mess going

[00:59:18] and sit there and just be like

[00:59:19] yeah, and we just

[00:59:21] and that's why we do our life.

[00:59:22] Sit down in the mess.

[00:59:23] Yep.

[00:59:23] Right.

[00:59:24] Right.

[00:59:25] And I kid this but

[00:59:27] like, you know for me

[00:59:28] even at night when all

[00:59:28] the kids go to bed

[00:59:30] you know, I'm like,

[00:59:31] oh let's like meditate

[00:59:32] or talk or do this,

[00:59:33] you know, and then I'm like

[00:59:34] let's just sit and watch

[00:59:35] a movie because I know

[00:59:36] that's what he wants to do

[00:59:37] and I like it too.

[00:59:38] But it's like sometimes

[00:59:40] I'm like, yeah, let's you

[00:59:41] know do this and connect

[00:59:42] and then it's like he's

[00:59:43] just like I'm done.

[00:59:44] As you said, he goes

[00:59:45] there and watches like

[00:59:46] okay, five minutes

[00:59:48] and he's so sweet

[00:59:49] because he'd be like,

[00:59:50] okay, yeah, let's do

[00:59:52] on the inside though.

[00:59:53] He's really

[00:59:54] like really

[00:59:56] all I want to do

[00:59:58] is watch episode of

[00:59:59] Seinfeld.

[00:59:59] That's all I want.

[01:00:00] I know.

[01:00:01] Yep.

[01:00:01] It's yeah.

[01:00:01] Yep.

[01:00:02] I mean that

[01:00:03] it really is

[01:00:04] part of the sacrifice also.

[01:00:08] Yeah.

[01:00:09] Yeah.

[01:00:10] So we want to thank you

[01:00:12] for joining us, but we

[01:00:13] also want to give you

[01:00:15] the opportunity if we

[01:00:16] want to learn more

[01:00:17] and our listeners want to

[01:00:18] learn more about your

[01:00:20] business ventures about

[01:00:22] your life and all the

[01:00:24] wonderful things going on.

[01:00:25] Where can we find you?

[01:00:27] Yeah, so you can go

[01:00:29] tab throu'l and I'm

[01:00:31] sure you'll put like

[01:00:31] I'll give you all the

[01:00:32] links for my social

[01:00:33] media and stuff like

[01:00:34] that tab throu'l.com is

[01:00:35] like my generic website.

[01:00:36] I have tabs trainings

[01:00:38] .com which has everything

[01:00:40] from like well fitness

[01:00:42] different this next year

[01:00:44] me and my team are

[01:00:44] working on getting all

[01:00:45] the freebies that I've

[01:00:47] helped coach people

[01:00:48] because I've been a

[01:00:48] coach for 16 years.

[01:00:49] I didn't really say

[01:00:50] that before but I from

[01:00:51] fitness to relationships

[01:00:53] to business development

[01:00:54] and things like that

[01:00:54] and we've had developed

[01:00:55] a lot of free resources

[01:00:57] and I just wanted to

[01:00:58] house them in one place

[01:00:59] for people so they can

[01:01:00] go and get those free

[01:01:01] resources and that is

[01:01:03] great.

[01:01:03] I started my own podcast

[01:01:05] what went wrong the

[01:01:06] untold stories of

[01:01:07] bouncing back from

[01:01:08] failure.

[01:01:09] So that was new this

[01:01:10] year.

[01:01:10] You can check that out

[01:01:11] on any podcast platform,

[01:01:13] but we are launching

[01:01:15] the family legacy project

[01:01:17] and what that is is

[01:01:18] it's helping young

[01:01:20] we say entrepreneurs

[01:01:21] but any business owner

[01:01:22] young family that

[01:01:24] wants legacy wealth

[01:01:26] and so we help you

[01:01:27] buy your first income

[01:01:28] property like what it

[01:01:29] really takes the ins

[01:01:30] and outs.

[01:01:31] So you cut the confusion

[01:01:32] you cut the cost of the

[01:01:34] oh yeah, I want to buy

[01:01:35] an income property

[01:01:36] but never really have

[01:01:37] or done we kind of

[01:01:38] help guide you through

[01:01:39] that give you all the

[01:01:40] step-by-step but then

[01:01:41] how do you keep that

[01:01:42] wealth so you've built

[01:01:43] the well and your

[01:01:44] space but how do you

[01:01:45] keep it for legacies

[01:01:46] that come so bringing

[01:01:47] the families and bringing

[01:01:49] your kids in on it

[01:01:50] like different things

[01:01:51] and we're going to do

[01:01:51] different masterminds

[01:01:52] with the kids and

[01:01:53] the parents and just

[01:01:55] different things so

[01:01:56] that it becomes a

[01:01:56] true legacy and the

[01:01:59] wealth that you're

[01:01:59] building doesn't just

[01:02:01] die when you do or

[01:02:03] it's there.

[01:02:04] I mean statistics show

[01:02:05] by third generation

[01:02:06] 90% of wealth is

[01:02:07] gone from that

[01:02:09] generation.

[01:02:10] So I'm pretty sure

[01:02:11] that your listeners

[01:02:12] if you're building

[01:02:12] a business, it's not

[01:02:13] to die in three

[01:02:14] generations like you

[01:02:15] want to keep it

[01:02:16] but there are things

[01:02:17] that you need to do

[01:02:17] right now to cultivate

[01:02:18] and it's not that

[01:02:19] you might not even

[01:02:21] know that the

[01:02:22] information but you're

[01:02:23] just not doing

[01:02:23] you're like us.

[01:02:24] You're so busy that

[01:02:25] you can't you know

[01:02:26] always apply it

[01:02:27] and there's even things

[01:02:28] with our kids that

[01:02:29] we haven't applied

[01:02:29] yet and so we want to

[01:02:31] unite with families help

[01:02:32] them take that to the

[01:02:33] next level by their

[01:02:34] first income property

[01:02:36] help them accelerate

[01:02:37] to their second third

[01:02:38] fourth down the line.

[01:02:39] We look at things

[01:02:40] with like working

[01:02:41] with them for like

[01:02:41] syndications bringing

[01:02:43] experts with like

[01:02:45] because I'm not a

[01:02:45] financial advisor but

[01:02:46] bringing other experts

[01:02:47] that we've been

[01:02:48] exposed to to help

[01:02:50] build a portfolio for

[01:02:52] their legacy beyond even

[01:02:53] giving them financial

[01:02:54] freedom so they can if

[01:02:55] they want if they have

[01:02:56] a job right now and

[01:02:57] they want to quit it

[01:02:57] or you know pull back

[01:02:59] on their entrepreneurial

[01:03:00] journey or their profits

[01:03:02] from their entrepreneur

[01:03:03] journey can go towards

[01:03:04] something that's actually

[01:03:05] investing building that

[01:03:07] what we call legacy

[01:03:08] wealth because we don't

[01:03:09] want it to just end

[01:03:10] with you and I know

[01:03:11] you don't want it to

[01:03:12] end with you and you

[01:03:13] want to build that

[01:03:14] for your kids and the

[01:03:15] character of what that

[01:03:16] means so we're launching

[01:03:17] that right now and

[01:03:19] it's again.

[01:03:20] It's a crazy and that's

[01:03:21] why I think I'm so

[01:03:22] excited God put that

[01:03:23] in our heart in 2020

[01:03:25] and it's 2024 right,

[01:03:27] right though.

[01:03:28] It's about time that

[01:03:30] we understand that no

[01:03:34] better time than now.

[01:03:36] You know what I'm saying?

[01:03:37] It's never too late and

[01:03:39] the thing about it is

[01:03:40] what you're doing is

[01:03:41] fantastic because I

[01:03:42] remember just you know

[01:03:44] in the years when I

[01:03:45] didn't know, you know

[01:03:46] I go to somebody and

[01:03:47] ask them, you know,

[01:03:48] how do I buy a house?

[01:03:49] I don't know go to bank.

[01:03:51] Yeah, right.

[01:03:51] No, I don't have any

[01:03:53] money.

[01:03:53] Yeah, right.

[01:03:54] We're just to be

[01:03:54] surrounded with other

[01:03:55] couples who have

[01:03:57] leveled their life is

[01:03:58] right.

[01:03:59] What I mean, we're

[01:04:00] going to like, you know,

[01:04:01] we're we're intriguing

[01:04:02] people with a want like

[01:04:04] if you want to earn

[01:04:05] an income property,

[01:04:06] but you're going to

[01:04:06] come into our world

[01:04:07] and it's going to again

[01:04:08] like in this podcast

[01:04:09] like your mind is

[01:04:10] going to be opened

[01:04:11] up even bigger than

[01:04:13] what you think right

[01:04:13] now. So it's like

[01:04:15] I want to tell people

[01:04:16] if you are intrigued

[01:04:16] at all like reach

[01:04:17] out. I'm on Facebook

[01:04:19] Tabitha Thorell

[01:04:20] and Instagram's tab

[01:04:22] thrall direct message

[01:04:23] me like I will or my

[01:04:25] team will definitely

[01:04:26] get back to you because

[01:04:27] this is something we're

[01:04:27] launching and so the

[01:04:29] founders of the people

[01:04:30] that start with us right

[01:04:31] now are obviously going

[01:04:32] to get a better rate

[01:04:33] than you know a year

[01:04:34] from now and we want

[01:04:35] to help the families

[01:04:37] right night a

[01:04:38] movement because I

[01:04:40] believe that entrepreneurs

[01:04:41] are going to change

[01:04:41] the world.

[01:04:42] I really do because

[01:04:43] think differently and

[01:04:44] we want to help you

[01:04:45] get there faster

[01:04:46] and change that mindset

[01:04:47] faster and be surrounded

[01:04:49] by people that think

[01:04:50] like you because if

[01:04:51] you're like us nobody

[01:04:53] else in your town

[01:04:53] thinks like you right

[01:04:55] right there you and

[01:04:56] the family think like

[01:04:57] you and so you need to

[01:04:58] be around people who

[01:04:59] think differently in order

[01:05:00] to achieve different

[01:05:02] results, but I think

[01:05:04] more than ever this

[01:05:05] time in our world.

[01:05:07] We have more people

[01:05:09] starting to think

[01:05:10] like this like everybody

[01:05:11] is wanting to side

[01:05:12] hustle. You know their

[01:05:14] minds have been opened

[01:05:15] up to the possibility.

[01:05:17] So I think right now

[01:05:19] is the time to to go

[01:05:21] out and do find your

[01:05:22] thing because I think

[01:05:23] everybody's a little

[01:05:25] more open to it.

[01:05:26] Yeah, yeah, they're

[01:05:27] thinking it but they're

[01:05:28] not doing it.

[01:05:29] I have to go all the

[01:05:30] time and they're like

[01:05:32] yeah, I really want to

[01:05:33] do it.

[01:05:33] It's like I want to

[01:05:34] do it.

[01:05:34] I want to get started

[01:05:35] to get started to

[01:05:36] maybe get started to

[01:05:37] maybe by to get

[01:05:38] started maybe to get

[01:05:38] started to get started

[01:05:39] and I'm like have

[01:05:40] you done anything and

[01:05:41] they're like the

[01:05:43] thing is they the

[01:05:44] pandemic the pandemic

[01:05:46] is horrible as it

[01:05:47] was.

[01:05:48] I think it created a

[01:05:49] shift in people's

[01:05:51] thinking.

[01:05:53] People went from I mean

[01:05:54] from corporation

[01:05:55] standpoint. Well, I

[01:05:56] can save money and

[01:05:57] just let people work

[01:05:58] from home.

[01:05:59] Now people who were

[01:06:00] forced to go home

[01:06:01] they were like shoot

[01:06:03] I kind of like this

[01:06:04] right.

[01:06:05] I want more of this

[01:06:06] I don't want to be

[01:06:06] at the office.

[01:06:07] So you know

[01:06:08] and when you

[01:06:09] answer it

[01:06:10] you know

[01:06:11] yeah

[01:06:12] and you know when

[01:06:12] you answer to

[01:06:13] somebody else in

[01:06:14] that time period

[01:06:15] it was taken

[01:06:16] away from you

[01:06:17] so quickly too.

[01:06:18] So I'm

[01:06:19] intrigued.

[01:06:20] So yes,

[01:06:22] we're going to keep

[01:06:23] an eye out on

[01:06:24] that because we are

[01:06:25] and we're a little

[01:06:26] bit older

[01:06:27] but that shift

[01:06:29] has finally

[01:06:30] hit and

[01:06:32] I actually think

[01:06:33] because we're a

[01:06:34] little bit older

[01:06:35] it's like there's

[01:06:36] an urgency with

[01:06:37] it.

[01:06:38] Yeah, you're ready

[01:06:39] to do it now

[01:06:39] and that's what

[01:06:40] we want like

[01:06:41] our somebody

[01:06:42] asked me who's

[01:06:42] like our avatar

[01:06:43] whatever and I

[01:06:44] said honestly

[01:06:45] like entrepreneurial

[01:06:46] couples with

[01:06:47] families whether

[01:06:48] you're 20

[01:06:49] or whether you're

[01:06:51] even 60

[01:06:51] because it's never

[01:06:52] too late.

[01:06:52] And that's the thing.

[01:06:54] Her dad started

[01:06:54] when he was about

[01:06:55] 65 years old.

[01:06:56] Yeah, he had never

[01:06:57] done it before

[01:06:58] and he's doing it

[01:06:58] now.

[01:06:59] So it's like

[01:06:59] and now he's

[01:07:00] able to enjoy

[01:07:01] things that he

[01:07:01] would have never

[01:07:02] been able to

[01:07:02] enjoy before

[01:07:03] but still have a

[01:07:04] purpose.

[01:07:04] You know, he

[01:07:05] didn't just

[01:07:05] retire like he

[01:07:06] was he still

[01:07:07] able to do

[01:07:07] the things

[01:07:08] and so that's

[01:07:09] what I want

[01:07:10] for people.

[01:07:10] It's like it's a

[01:07:11] place where

[01:07:12] you can come

[01:07:12] and you can

[01:07:13] grow your

[01:07:14] wealth,

[01:07:15] but also

[01:07:15] your thinking

[01:07:16] and you can

[01:07:17] leave that to

[01:07:17] your kids

[01:07:18] because even

[01:07:18] if your kids

[01:07:18] are 26

[01:07:19] and 24

[01:07:20] and 21

[01:07:20] whatever they're

[01:07:21] still watching

[01:07:22] you and they

[01:07:23] still want your

[01:07:23] wisdom.

[01:07:24] So whatever

[01:07:25] wisdom you have

[01:07:26] at whatever

[01:07:27] age you

[01:07:28] will trickle

[01:07:28] on and they'll

[01:07:29] actually accept

[01:07:30] it better

[01:07:31] because they're

[01:07:32] older and so

[01:07:33] doing those

[01:07:34] things and then

[01:07:34] you can get

[01:07:35] them started

[01:07:36] at a young

[01:07:36] age and they

[01:07:38] have they

[01:07:38] can come

[01:07:39] into the

[01:07:39] circle and

[01:07:40] they can

[01:07:41] you know,

[01:07:41] and so it's

[01:07:42] like it's never

[01:07:42] really too

[01:07:43] late.

[01:07:43] It's like we

[01:07:45] didn't have

[01:07:45] the right

[01:07:46] people surrounding

[01:07:47] us when

[01:07:48] our kids were

[01:07:48] really little

[01:07:49] so we played

[01:07:50] it really

[01:07:50] safe and

[01:07:52] that was fine.

[01:07:52] It's fine.

[01:07:53] And if you want to

[01:07:54] play it safe and

[01:07:54] but we wish

[01:07:56] that we would have

[01:07:57] been around some

[01:07:57] people that would

[01:07:58] have pushed the

[01:07:58] limits a little

[01:07:59] bit as far as

[01:08:00] that goes because

[01:08:00] we really played

[01:08:01] it safe when

[01:08:02] we didn't really

[01:08:02] need to

[01:08:03] and so that's

[01:08:04] where it's like

[01:08:05] when we can

[01:08:05] get these

[01:08:05] people and like

[01:08:06] help them

[01:08:07] consult them

[01:08:07] give them a

[01:08:08] little certainty

[01:08:08] and say,

[01:08:09] you know,

[01:08:10] it's not

[01:08:10] really as bad

[01:08:11] as you think

[01:08:11] it is and

[01:08:12] this is

[01:08:12] where it's

[01:08:13] at and

[01:08:13] shifting those

[01:08:14] things because

[01:08:15] if you want to

[01:08:16] buy an

[01:08:16] income property,

[01:08:17] there's

[01:08:17] information all

[01:08:18] over the

[01:08:18] internet.

[01:08:19] I mean,

[01:08:19] I'm just going

[01:08:20] to be honest.

[01:08:20] There's information

[01:08:21] all over the

[01:08:21] internet,

[01:08:22] but if you want

[01:08:22] to be successful,

[01:08:24] accelerate faster

[01:08:25] and do it in

[01:08:26] a way that

[01:08:26] brings you

[01:08:27] joy and

[01:08:28] legacy,

[01:08:29] there's nothing

[01:08:30] that I've seen

[01:08:31] on the internet

[01:08:31] that is what

[01:08:32] we are going

[01:08:32] to provide

[01:08:33] for people

[01:08:33] and that's

[01:08:34] what I want.

[01:08:34] I want it

[01:08:35] to be a

[01:08:35] community,

[01:08:36] a movement

[01:08:37] to go

[01:08:38] forward and

[01:08:39] not just

[01:08:39] oh,

[01:08:40] I bought this

[01:08:40] income property

[01:08:41] or oh,

[01:08:41] I flipped

[01:08:41] this house.

[01:08:42] It's like

[01:08:42] how did

[01:08:43] that build

[01:08:43] your legacy?

[01:08:44] Right,

[01:08:45] right.

[01:08:47] I think

[01:08:47] that's going

[01:08:47] to be key

[01:08:48] because,

[01:08:49] you know,

[01:08:49] we tend to

[01:08:50] look at wealth

[01:08:51] and the society

[01:08:52] as from the

[01:08:52] financial aspect,

[01:08:54] but wealth

[01:08:55] is also knowledge.

[01:08:56] Yep.

[01:08:57] Passing that

[01:08:58] knowledge on

[01:08:59] is going to

[01:08:59] continue your

[01:09:00] legacy also

[01:09:01] because I

[01:09:02] often think

[01:09:02] about well,

[01:09:03] what did my

[01:09:03] granddaddy

[01:09:04] teach me

[01:09:04] or what did

[01:09:05] my dad teach me?

[01:09:06] My dad

[01:09:08] he didn't

[01:09:08] teach me

[01:09:08] necessarily how

[01:09:09] to save money

[01:09:10] but he taught me

[01:09:10] how to work

[01:09:11] for money.

[01:09:11] So how can I

[01:09:12] add to that

[01:09:13] lesson?

[01:09:13] Pass it

[01:09:14] through my

[01:09:14] career

[01:09:15] and say,

[01:09:15] okay,

[01:09:15] now you take

[01:09:16] that money

[01:09:17] and you

[01:09:17] invest it

[01:09:18] now.

[01:09:18] Yep.

[01:09:19] That's how you

[01:09:19] going to

[01:09:20] build and

[01:09:20] that's we just

[01:09:21] continue on

[01:09:22] that's how

[01:09:22] you that's

[01:09:23] how you

[01:09:23] build legacy.

[01:09:24] Well,

[01:09:25] and then

[01:09:25] something else

[01:09:26] that we

[01:09:26] talked about

[01:09:26] and then

[01:09:27] we can

[01:09:27] we because

[01:09:28] we will be

[01:09:28] here all day,

[01:09:29] but the

[01:09:29] one thing

[01:09:29] that I

[01:09:30] love is

[01:09:31] that we

[01:09:32] want to

[01:09:32] do masterminds

[01:09:33] with the

[01:09:33] kids because

[01:09:34] you know

[01:09:35] that third

[01:09:36] party credibility

[01:09:37] with kids

[01:09:37] is huge.

[01:09:38] Yes.

[01:09:38] So like

[01:09:39] you can

[01:09:39] tell them

[01:09:40] one thing

[01:09:40] and somebody

[01:09:41] else says

[01:09:41] something.

[01:09:42] So for

[01:09:43] the parents

[01:09:43] out there

[01:09:44] you're telling

[01:09:45] your kids

[01:09:45] something and

[01:09:46] we want to

[01:09:46] help solidify

[01:09:47] it for you.

[01:09:48] Help give

[01:09:49] that credibility

[01:09:50] and also

[01:09:51] their peers

[01:09:52] because of the

[01:09:52] peers are going

[01:09:53] to hear it

[01:09:53] too.

[01:09:53] And they're

[01:09:53] going to make

[01:09:54] you know what

[01:09:54] that is

[01:09:54] right.

[01:09:55] And then

[01:09:55] they're going

[01:09:55] to be like

[01:09:56] oh because

[01:09:57] our kids

[01:09:57] around other

[01:09:58] kids who

[01:09:59] might not

[01:09:59] have the

[01:10:00] right thinking

[01:10:00] as well

[01:10:01] and so

[01:10:01] when they

[01:10:01] can be

[01:10:02] around other

[01:10:02] people and

[01:10:03] hear that

[01:10:03] at another

[01:10:04] level.

[01:10:04] It's

[01:10:05] just going

[01:10:05] to anchor

[01:10:06] it in

[01:10:06] and again

[01:10:07] that's

[01:10:07] the difference.

[01:10:08] That's why

[01:10:08] this program

[01:10:09] is different.

[01:10:10] That's

[01:10:10] why you

[01:10:10] can't

[01:10:11] say,

[01:10:11] oh I

[01:10:11] can just

[01:10:12] teach my

[01:10:12] kids this

[01:10:13] you probably

[01:10:14] can and

[01:10:15] I'm not saying

[01:10:15] they're

[01:10:16] not listening

[01:10:16] to you but

[01:10:17] when you have

[01:10:18] that third

[01:10:18] party when

[01:10:19] you have

[01:10:19] somebody

[01:10:20] else and

[01:10:20] then you're

[01:10:21] bouncing

[01:10:21] ideas off

[01:10:22] and you

[01:10:22] can surround

[01:10:23] yourself.

[01:10:23] I mean

[01:10:24] there's a

[01:10:24] true statement

[01:10:25] that you

[01:10:25] are who

[01:10:26] you surround

[01:10:26] yourself with

[01:10:27] and so

[01:10:27] when you

[01:10:28] can surround

[01:10:28] your kids

[01:10:29] and yourself

[01:10:29] around that

[01:10:30] even just

[01:10:30] doing

[01:10:31] like weekly

[01:10:31] Zooms

[01:10:32] where people

[01:10:32] can share

[01:10:33] like what

[01:10:33] their new

[01:10:34] up-and-coming

[01:10:35] venture is

[01:10:35] and whether

[01:10:36] it has

[01:10:36] to do with

[01:10:37] their business

[01:10:37] or the

[01:10:38] real estate

[01:10:39] stuff.

[01:10:39] What's

[01:10:40] coming up

[01:10:41] for you?

[01:10:41] What's

[01:10:42] working?

[01:10:42] What's not

[01:10:43] working?

[01:10:43] We're

[01:10:44] in that space.

[01:10:45] Yes, it is so

[01:10:46] huge all the

[01:10:47] big-time

[01:10:48] players.

[01:10:49] That's what they

[01:10:50] do.

[01:10:51] That's why they

[01:10:52] make the big

[01:10:53] bucks because

[01:10:54] they invest

[01:10:55] in those and

[01:10:56] they're like

[01:10:57] $250,000 $500,000

[01:10:58] to be in

[01:10:59] these masterminds,

[01:11:00] but it's

[01:11:01] up-leveling

[01:11:02] their game.

[01:11:03] They're making

[01:11:04] eight figures

[01:11:05] nine

[01:11:06] figures for a

[01:11:07] reason because

[01:11:08] they're so

[01:11:09] and we just

[01:11:10] want to make

[01:11:11] it available

[01:11:12] to you.

[01:11:13] So, if you

[01:11:14] get a tangible

[01:11:15] result, let's

[01:11:16] get your first

[01:11:17] income property

[01:11:18] or your second,

[01:11:19] but like

[01:11:20] advance your

[01:11:21] income property.

[01:11:22] Here's a

[01:11:23] better way and

[01:11:24] then bring

[01:11:25] you into

[01:11:26] the circle so

[01:11:27] that you can

[01:11:28] grow that

[01:11:29] legacy wealth.

[01:11:30] Right, right.

[01:11:31] I love that.

[01:11:32] That sounds

[01:11:33] fantastic.

[01:11:34] And I'd like

[01:11:35] to add to

[01:11:36] another thing

[01:11:37] that was

[01:11:38] probably needed

[01:11:39] especially

[01:11:40] today's society

[01:11:41] is

[01:11:42] the

[01:11:43] people that

[01:11:44] are

[01:11:45] in the

[01:11:46] middle of

[01:11:47] the

[01:11:48] business.

[01:11:49] I

[01:11:50] think

[01:11:51] it's

[01:11:52] important

[01:11:53] to

[01:11:54] have

[01:11:55] a

[01:11:56] good

[01:11:57] life

[01:11:58] and

[01:11:59] a good

[01:12:00] life.

[01:12:01] I think

[01:12:02] it's

[01:12:03] important

[01:12:04] to

[01:12:05] have

[01:12:06] a good

[01:12:07] life

[01:12:08] and

[01:12:09] have

[01:12:10] a good

[01:12:11] life.

[01:12:12] I think

[01:12:13] it's

[01:12:14] important

[01:12:15] to have

[01:12:16] a good

[01:12:17] life.

[01:12:18] I think

[01:12:19] it's

[01:12:20] important

[01:13:10] to

[01:13:11] have

[01:13:12] you

[01:13:13] the

[01:13:14] best

[01:13:15] life

[01:13:16] in

[01:13:17] your

[01:13:18] life.

[01:13:19] I think

[01:13:20] it's

[01:13:21] important

[01:13:22] to have

[01:13:23] a good

[01:13:24] life and

[01:13:25] a good

[01:13:26] life in

[01:13:27] your

[01:13:28] life.

[01:13:29] I think

[01:13:30] it's

[01:13:31] important

[01:13:32] to have

[01:13:33] a good

[01:13:34] life in

[01:13:35] your

[01:13:36] life.

[01:13:37] —

[01:13:38] —

[01:13:39] YouTube, not free. Otherwise you would have bought that income property 10 years ago when you first

[01:13:43] said it. Yep, you're right. Well, this has been wonderful. Thanks again. Yes, thank you. Good

[01:13:53] morning, guys. We appreciate it so much. We'll make sure that we have everything listed so that

[01:13:58] listeners can find you online and we certainly appreciate you taking out your time to share

[01:14:03] with us. You are welcome. Thanks for joining us on this episode of the Beyond our DuPont.

[01:14:17] Please make sure to like this episode and also subscribe to our podcast. You can also find us

[01:14:24] on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube at the Beyond our DuPont podcast. And until next time,

[01:14:31] we will holla at y'all.